There is the probability of being MIA for a couple more weeks while I finish 1.) my three help_haiti fic, one of which is mostly done but I keep picking at, 2.) War Games, which actually is done but I've gone beyond picking at it and am now engaged in cosmetic surgery on, 3.) work (I know! Why? Why do I have to work when I have one hundred and seventy five thousand accumulated words of fic to finish and post! Why?), and 4.) Child has a meeting with a behavioral psychologist and whatever this week. I feel this will be productive.

However, in lieu of content--seriously, I spent a week angsting over (This Is) Not a Statement because I had a bad feeling if I didn't finish it in one fell swoop it would enter WIP hell and I made a resolution after SGA that I'd never, ever post anything I wouldn't finish, and I can no longer call this a flirt fandom when I'm throwing out novellas--I have instead an ode to girlnamedpixley

So back in November, I asked girlnamedpixley to help me get a few pictures together for War Games since I ended up with a cast list a bit larger than I expected and some not entirely canon-compliant. If you want to see the horror I achieve when trying to do pics, go to my website under covers and wince. So you see why I went to an expert.

...there's like, a folder of art now. IDEK. It's like magic. Every time we talked, she had new stuff done that I'd gape over for a week while she swanned her way out. Then apparently, she thought that You'll Get There in the End was feeling neglected and sad that it did not have this much attention paid to it.

So. Below, the (very partial) fruits of girlnamedpixley's labor.

( cover: war games )

And because she was worried about the first fic.

( cover: you'll get there in the end )

She also created a PDF file for download, which I uploaded to my site after much fighting with Filezilla, and also fighting to remember my password--I forgot my password.

You'll Get There in the End (It Just Takes a While), PDF, 1.15 MB. She also is doing one for War Games when I send my final draft to her (she only looks at me now while I explain there is an important page one hundred seventy sentence that must be fixed! Because yeah, that sentence has issues. Or rather, I do.)

I like girlnamedpixley. I ask for like, a picture, and I get a gallery. It's like Christmas! But no one tries to give me tube socks or snuggies, so really, it's like Christmas with a pony. A pony with magical art skills.

ETA: edited for size, wow. Sorry!

Um. Okay, wow

Joan and Rodney by summertea. It's--it's wow. Sweet and sensual and just--God. I love the positions, the look on her face, the intimacy of it.

*sighs dreamily* Um. Yeah. This is possibly the best week I've had in a long time.

girlnamedpixley, being, you know, *amazing*, sent me another cover for the Atlantis Project AU.

The absolutely *gorgeous* (God, *JOHN*) cover for Puerto Vallarta" is here.

*stares at John* God.

Seriously, her ability with manips? Blows my mind.

svmadelyn has a poll up for those who are interested in participating in Slumberparty 2005 here. We are just doing cities right now, a check for preference, feasibility, so forth. As we are now Knowlegedable on this subject, since last year? We didn't end up with any deaths or food poisonings! Go us!

And.

slodwick made the most gorgeous cover for Pretty When You're Mine. I am *awash* in prettiness. And Clark's *hair*--is it wrong to get him an in-fiction haircut to go with that? Cause wow, that so works for me.

*hugs slodwick.* You blow my mind. Wow. Thank you so very much. Cookies for you!

Because issaro *spoils* me so. Much.

( issaro pics for Landscape! )

issaro is totally spoiling me.

( new pic for Sleep While I Drive )

Prettiness

josselin and soundczech are authors of the month at Revival board. Go annoy them with questions. I think I shall ask what they eat for dinner every night. Because I can. *g*

They also have a webpage up called Blatant Narcissism. I love that name, don't you?

White Collar - WiP by soundczech - Brian and Stockwell. It's just one of those times you *have* to.

That's it. Good fic to read. Get to it. I'm going to go entertain myself imagining the flame war that almost happpened but didn't. *g*

Of course I'd chip my tooth on Friday! Of course. You know, an hour after every dentist with sense is home and laughing wildly, because seriously, in a former life, I must have pissed off vast cohorts of dentists to have the dental issues I have.

Flossing, which I am beginning to suspect was primitive man's way of showing worship to Dentists, considering how often they espouse it, is moving up to four times a day. Yes, I am going to look moronic in the lady's room at work, but seriously, MY FRONT TOOTH.

Okay, it doesn't look nearly as bad as I think it does. No one noticed until I pointed it out, but I notice. My lip notices. My lip keeps getting scratched on it, and it hurts, and it makes me gripey. My lip hurts, I am gripey, not the tooth hurts and my lip is gripey.

Can you tell I'm having some serious trouble sleeping?

*sighs* Bad week. Hell, bad month.

In other late breaking news, I have work tomorrow again. The nice thing is, I am making comp time nicely. The bad thing is, it's WORK. Plus Child's t-ball practice. Plus at some point, I need to go shopping (and wow, I love being able to say that, 'need') and get a few more outfits for work and God, do I need a haircut and an MP3 player.

What? Yes, I NEED one. I want mobile music.

However, like all really lousy times, silvery lining. Actually, a black and red lining.

( lookie, lookie! )
Edited The Great Gay Sexathon that rageprufrock and I are working on erratically. I've noticed that if I don't try to concentrate too hard, I can keep going. Finally got four pages of Arkham completely clean and together, though the rest is still disassembled in email I sent myself from work. It's odd. Like The Yard, so to speak, Arkham works best written in snippets and ended quickly--when I figured that out, it started smoothing out. Devin, btw, who I'm cowriting with, has written some GOOD stuff here. *grins* I keep a hard copy at work to inspire me.

And you know, leaving that around my computer probably wasn't the brightest idea since they're doing upgrades this weekend. *thinks* Well, huh. If they read it, they'll be surprised.

Next week--training for the brand new interface system that replaces the one we have now. It's pretty, Windows-like instead of DOS-like, and pretty cool to use.

Totally gratuitous entry here. I'm still catching up on my friendslist.

But, recs. Just one. Because it is GOOD.

box_of_serial continues to completely enchant me. Alex and Julian are almost painfully hot together. Dear God, are they hot. And so much fun. And so much plot. So much first-seasony. I adore Liv. I really do.

*sighs* Must find porn. Now. *stomps foot*

Because bexless made me lose the ability to breathe.

Cavemen!CLex. Oh dearest GOD. Yes. This--HYSTERICAL!

And I'll tell her so. RIGHT when LJ lets me post comments again. Becuase I did today! I did! I posted replies and comments and then--it stopped. Bastard.

But anyway.

Still, Eg thought to himself, drawing himself up to his not-yet-fully-erect five foot and two inches, it couldn’t hurt to ask.

“Ug,” said Eg again. When this drew no response, he pointed his purplewood spear at his own chest and said, ‘Eg.”

The creature tilted its head to the side, green eyes shining. “Ug?” it said.

Eg sighed. Definitely an Enng. He pointed the spear at himself again. “Eg,” he said clearly. Then he pointed the spear at the young Enng and made what he thought might be an appropriate noise when attempting to ascertain someone’s identity. “Ooo?”

Ah, a new word. Excellent.

The Enng looked from the spear up at Eg, and bared his – startlingly white – teeth in a not entirely unpleasant manner. “Arg.”

“Arg?” Eg thought it best to make sure it was the creature’s name, and not simply a new vowel-syllable combination essential to the evolution of mankind’s spoken language.

Makes you just want to run out and find some nice Neanderthals to nail, hmm?

*grins* Maybe not. Unless they are Eg-ian.

Recs -- the Te Collection

*thinks* She keeps blaming me for one of these.

Rhetoric by Te, who is, in fact, an actual fic crack dealer. Am I really interested in going back to X-Men after all this time? Noooo. Well. *thinks* Maybe. It's JOHNNY! And God, is he hot. And he thinks WAY too much.

Sugar and Spice. Oh dearest GOD. Poor Logan-ette. Yes, you read that right. And really, you have to read it more than once.

*still laughing*

Float by Te. Oh hell yes. Oh HELL YES. And oh GOD yes.

*clears throat* You know. Read it. *nod*

Recs -- The Helen Collective

I meant to do a long entry about Rivka's latest, but it turned into a kind of weird fangirl essay comparing Rivka to some recent saints and not a few famous courtesans, and well. You know? I'm willing to be abjectly devoted, but it just gets creepy when you're mooning how wonderful someone's vowel constructions are. So. *g* We'll save that one for when I feel more shameless.

Instead, other stories.

Adding to Zero by hwmitzy Why Helen? Well, apparently, here's an answer to teh question. Wow.

And....

The Reckoning by latxcvi. Because watching Lex get revenge? It IS that good. Talk about some serious, serious catharsis. *shivers* That was GOOD for me.

Recs -- Other

Boys Don't Cry by aelita Awhile back, I swore off of anything that broke up the boys. Yes, I know, stupid resolution, and I'm glad I broke it because I would have missed THIS. Wonderful Clark POV, lovely style, and maybe the exception that proves the rule regarding songfic, if this IS songfic, because this worked in ALL ways. Melancholy and melodic and so sad and so inevitable. Beautiful writing all around.

To Have and To Hold by hwmitzy Ahh yes. Oh yes. And damn yes. *happy* Denialfic is JUST the thing! *happy*

More later.

The Spam Report

Okay, here's a thought for would-be spammers. May be difficult to get, since spammers are way down at the bottom of the food chain, right there with militant fundamentalists and people who don't brush their teeth, but let's try. If you want to spam me? DON'T MISSPELL THE SUBJECT LINE.

Just for a thought. Let us compare.

CEE MY BYG PEEENEES!!!!!.??/!

to

SEE MY BIG PENIS!

Let's look at this.

First off, penis the word in itself I don't find sexy. Maybe some do, but well. Penis is just a really weird word. Say it five times fast. When one says penis, I do not think of sex or power or, well, hot, but rather, that is a really weird word. Or I think of anatomical books of sad little penii all curled up on themselves because they are camera shy.

But leaving that aside, I also look for penii to be rather educated. Who wants a dumb, non-sophisticated penis anyway, especially taking up valuable vaginal real estate? Should I be interested in yours, I'd like to think I was getting one of above average, if not well above average, quality and education, and well, that spam? Does not demonstrate this.

Also, big? This is where it gets tricky. I'm sure there are people who want and like giant, invasive penii the size of mountain ranges. Me? Not so much. If it requires some kinds of flexibility exercises and gymnastics to make everything fit? I'm going to get something from the freezer and just watch a movie instead, kay? You and your big penis just go somewhere else. Because, should I so lose my mind as to want an uneducated penis, or an educated one with bad spelling, I would like one that won't require some kind of medical attention afterward.

And even getting beyond that, even should I WANT a penis, to see a penis, or to hang around with one on a casual basis, even if the subject line was a huge fluke and really, that penis mentioned inside is of superior quality and education that was just having a bad day, even IF it's big but not too big? I'm a girl. I want subtle, meaningful, and romantic. There's a reason the romance novel market is so good. I'll mock it to my dying day, but man, you turn on the RIGHT kind of romantic lines? Mmmmm.

Just keep that in mind. Hopefully, this little lesson will improve the quality of my spam.

And no, still not interested in the Britney-look-alike/horse/chicken menage a trois on video. No, really. Promise.

And also? Really tired of the latest virus round. Beyond words to describe.

Bored

I'm as moody as always, but with an added bonus of gripey. I need music recs and I need them NOW. NOW NOW NOW. Something darkish and not to much bass. Moody, though. Think dark and moody and maybe a bit of hopelessness, but not too much.

Yes, I did like Exodus enough not to even try to spellcheck. Now, on any given day, I rarely spellcheck my LJ entries, because I tend to do them in one sitting or relatively fast. Exodus is the case that proves I should, because wow. I counted thirty. If not more. I think. *shudders* Don't tell me if it's over thirty, kay?

I've been thinking about Exodus, and talking the plotline over with people regarding the entire Helen-Lionel-Lex thing.

Here's spoilery thoughts, for those still waiting for Sunday.

( things that don't make sense )

Working on The Yard and staring at it, because well, it's still up in the air in terms of what I think it should do as opposed to what it apparently wants to do, like, say, have sex now with absolutely no motive or reason. Stupid story.

This is SV related and something I pondered while watching Witness. This could be a sign that I am WAY to damn into my fandom.

It used to be, when Clark did something stupid/oblivious/ridiculous/moronic/etc, I would think, oh Clark, you dumbass. Blah blah blahty-blah blah. See the diary for the Jenn's Anti-Clark stand back in April-May last year. Not pretty, but man, did I get energetic.

Anyway.

Now, I think, oh Clark, you have ANY idea what rageprufrock is going to DO to you when the show's over? Did you NOT read Barnstorming? Oh God, you are so doomed.

Yep.

Other strange thoughts.

Jonathan, being dumb -- I wonder how liviapenn will defend *that*. *sticks out tongue at Livia*

Lex, being manipulative -- latxcvi and harriet_spy are so going to kick your ass in reviews, baby. Watch out.

Lana, being herself -- You do know that half my fandom is going to KILL you tonight, right? Step AWAY from Clark now.

Helen, appearing or mentioned -- You do know that half my fandom is going to KILL you tonight or sell you to Lionel, right? Just wait.

Lionel and Lex in the same scene -- Mm. Flood of bad incestfic. Must take precautions. Hiding is good.

MotW -- I wonder who will assign the coolest pet name?

I--get like this sometimes. *worried*

I probably need more sleep or some anti-psychotics to ease me through this, but it does amuse.

Speaking of amusing and pleasing and all KINDS of good things.

rageprufrock made a KICK ASS cover for Three Impossible Things! Yay! Yayayayay! It is SO cool! *huggles Pru* You rocketh, honey. So good. So very, very good.

( new pic )

Anyway. Two non-insta!recs, but stories I really, really loved.

Not to Be by joyfulgirl. Fabulously written, intersting five premises, and five REALLY good AUs. I can't even decide which one I like best.

Salvage by rageprufrock I'd love to discuss this one with someone, because I really loved the sheer hopelessness going on--or the very light traces of future-riftness and hurtiness. Beautiful.

Still moody, so hieing myself off before I whine. Contemplate my fingernails, perhaps. Make the "you knwo you've been reading WAY TOO FUCKING MUCH Clark/Lex slash" list that starts with "if you go to work and giggle every time someone mentions liking bottled water, seriously, you have gone over the edge."

Which I am totally okay with.

Will get caught up on comments soon, I swear. I am sickeningly behind, but on the other hand, I got my first paycheck yesterday! Whoo hoo!

here was bitching that I cut out.

Change moods.

Okay, forget that. Forget it. I started this entry too early. Because my mood just took a leap for the ether. *grins* Ask me why.

I have an interview on Monday for this job--this job I WANT. Not just one I have to do, not just annoying tempness, but a job-job, with such esoteric things as benefits and dental insurance and this wonderous thing called a REGULAR PAYCHECK that gets deposited in one's account where one can get the money out later and use it. And not ONLY these things. Because these things alone do not make a jenn happy, though the prospect of buying these boots I've been contemplating are quite the thing. Not to mention the prospect of a new computer, which I need desperately.

This one is one I WANT. I know this stuff. And it's state, so it's viciously comfortable and regular, as I have worked in it before and I actually DO know what policy is and what I'll be doing.

Fuck bad mood and cramps and my lack of chocolate. And screw temper tantrums and fannish politics and the sheer lack of coffee in the house right now.

Will not get too excited. Because I might not get it.

Forget that, too. I'm allowed to be completely elated without any actual reason to be. I'm perfectly ready to concede misery next week if I don't get it, but until then? Heh. Meaningless elation.

The woman who will interview me was enthusiastic as heck, and apparently went through several people trying to find my current phone number. I got my evaluation a while back but really didn't think much on it since there was a huge pool, but apparently, my percentile was highest in the group of interviewees, and what the HELL, you know, I'm happy. Happy happy happy happy happy.

I AM breathing! But dammit, I haven't had a job I liked in forever.

And new computer. With capture software and a new monitor and those boots...though I don't think Dell will give me boots with the computer I want.

Um. Right.

fleurbleue makes a gorgeouscover for Six AM. *staring* Honey, that's hot. Hot hot hot. Dear God.

I'm sure I'm missing something. Fannish war, gripeyness, something, but right now? Do. Not. Care. Rivers run wine, candy falls from the sky, puppies have been found after a long search, and I have one beta for Somewhere and Gladly Beyond from Ann on my hard drive, ready to start the fixing.

And love to hwmitzy and thete1 and devinmoonshine and blackfall and pearl_o who have been putting up with my high-snark, low-nice, icky-bad-bitchy mood all this week. I'll make it up to you. Possibly with advanced groveling.

A night of LJ withdrawl was horrible, horrible, horrible. You know, at this rate, I'd better get a really reliable addiction, like, say, heroin.

But anyway.

Due to karma because I was laughing at a friend buried in snow, rain has begun. And when I say rain, I mean, I am watching for Noah and his Ark out the window rain, and I swear, the animals around here are moving two by two toward some unknown destination. It's slightly surreal. I went to bed last night with some normal raininess and woke up to the Poseiden Adventure in the front yard. Driving The Child to school, I watched the rushing rivers where there were once fields and monitored bridges in some interest. I live on a hill. There are two road-type ways off this hill and both involve bridges. No, I am not driving over muddy fields to get away if necessary. The only thing I really never worry about up here is actual flash flooding. Tornados, yes. Flash flooding, not so much. But those bridges are interesting to watch.

My area holds the unofficial highest rainfall in a twenty-four hour period--either for the state or the country, I really can't remember which. No, I don't know why it's not official, but it is somewhere in an almanac of some kind because as a kid, I had to look it up at school. Growing up, I never could figure out why so many fields had very, very deeply cut trenches (and a LOT of them) and why there were so many bridges up until my fourth grade science teacher told us about that year. Over the years, of course, they wore down (no trees, soil shift, what have you), but the original cuts in the landscape were made many, many, MANY years ago, well before I or I think even my parents were born if I remember correctly, and every so often, we get another Really Rainy Period to recut the trenches. The dry spell a few years back did a LOT to even out the landscape.

Right, uninteresting in the extreme. Moving on.

Recs Redux

My Rainy Day Reading. I've recced them at various times since I first read them and they are among those I curl up with whenever I need a pick me up. This only covers about ten percent of my harddrive-saved fic, since anything I like well enough to read more than once goes into a folder for emergency pick-me-ups.

For sanity of friends page, cutting here, recs inside. I got a little--er, carried away.

( recs redux )

Okay, that took more time than I thought. Have to hurry now.

Got caught up in Adobe yesterday, as I am wont to do when I can't write or am sulking about a bad episode. Or when I'm avoiding tstar78 and grrleloquence murmuring sweet Lucas nothings. *grins* Okay, so that was me mumbling those at them in hopes of inspiring them, but they enable, dammit. And they didn't run away too fast, either.

Anyway. A cover came out of it.

( cover for one thousand miles by zahra )

I'm reorganizing my memories, so anyone who actually checks out that page will notice some shifting around as I add in episode reviews and specific story reviews into the mix. I'm going to eventually post some Star Trek and X-Men ones I did in my other fandoms, especially the ASC awards feedback votes, since I go through phases of being ultra locquacious in feedback, much to the amusement of those who get my long, long interpretations of their fics.

Mmm. Rainy days.

First off, recs of happiness. *g* Yay yay yay!

Three Fairy Tales of Smallville by the amazing koimistress Three stories in the style of the "Five Things That Aren't True", with three AUs, each very different from the last. I adored the first, loved the second, but the third creeped me out and whoa, that was good. Read.

To get some of Koi's thoughts on her story, its genesis, etc, go here. Interesting , and damn, she rocks.

The Test by paperbkryter, missing scene--explains some things about Lex's shirt. *g* This is SO cute.

Untitled Lillian fic by martianhousecat. Lillian fic is rare as hell, and this one just about makes up for it. Lillian growing up, short and bittersweet. I'd give a LOT for this author to extend this, because this is both extremely good and a fascinating view into Lillian Luthor, before and after marriage.

Incurable by bexless. Hee! Clark and Lex and poetry! And more than that, but really, it's BEX, you don't need more to want to read. Lovely, per always.

Pretty Pics

Kat sent two of the loveliest covers I've ever seen--one for the Spaces series! I didn't even know anyone READ that in, well--er, forever? And one for Only Sometimes that, frankly, is absolutely gorgeous. Whoa.

*hugs Kat* Absolutely beautiful, chica. Thank you SO much. Dear God, it amazes me what people can do with pictures.

( covers )

Places to Go

paperbkryter unveils WB's latest series idea, an amazing look at geriatric Superman and Lex Luthor in the retirement home for the Unusually Powerful.

The pilot features an action packed wheelchair race through the hallways of Shady Oaks as Clark makes off with Lex's dentures in a fit of pique.

*dying on the floor* Well, I'm ALL for this one.

And I read this--days ago? I can't remember, but just--heee! martianhousecat reveals The Rules for Writing Lex Luthor.

Special attention to these.

6. Thou shalt not have him cry unless he's had a limb removed, relived the death of his mother, or is having a very bad acid trip. Lex Luthor doesn't cry over failed love affairs, he gets even. Over and over and over.

7. Thou shalt not have him utter the word 'can't' in reference to himself. Lex can do anything. Or so he believes. He is also unaware of the meaning of the term 'no'.

*giggling* Oh yes.

I tend to love people who make me spit coffee on my keyboard. This poor, poor keyboard suffers, but you know, for a good cause. Read and enjoy them all.

Other Things

Someone, please, write me Lex/Lucas? Please? Come on. It's only fair. Lex has been slashed with EVERYONE, including some inanimate objects and not a few characters that don't even exist in the same comics continuum. *grins* Okay, he hasn't officially been slashed with Pete Ross yet, but I realy, really tried really hard and surely someone else has gotten around to it. Right? Right?

There was Lucas-half-nakedness (whoo) and tattoos and good hair and some serious, serious issues floating around here. And tension and daddy-issues. And did anyone notice the rainy-Lexness? The story will practically write itself!

*looks puppyish* Come on. Dirty wrongness? Like bientot said, and I quote, because this is a Very Wise Statement.

Taken from comments on episode in my LJ.

Well, I may be a little prejudiced, but I can't imagine Lex being less than pretty with anyone. And his only-mildly-a-little half-brother (hardly incest at all, when you really think about it) is almost as physically attractive as he is morally dubious.

See? It's barely even actual incest. BARELY. See? She agrees with me! *love* So damn wise. Doncha think?

Yes, that's me, trying to enable anything that moves in my line of sight.

Okay, am going to get some actual editing done, since I won't have time tomorrow.

Everyone's covered the destruction of the Columbia, which has been--well, terrible. I remember Challenger. I think fourth grade, and it took forever for our teachers to get an explanation out that made sense to us.

God be with those who were lost and with those left behind.

*****

Two icons, courtesey of thete1. My fanficboyfriend is Spike. For some reason, this sound really reasonable to me.

And...happy birthday penelope_z! Sorry, chica, I didn't really check LJ much, and this is late. *lovelovelove* Your stories make me think and your art is amazing. I'm so so glad to have met you and that you're playing in SV.

*hugs*

On my main LJ page, I actually added a link, thanks to pearlo, which will TELL me when birthdays are so I am, with any kind of decent luck, no longer late. Also, made a memories thingie, once the instructions were given to me in nice, plain English, so story snippets are somewhat organized. Oh happiness!

Let's see, what else....

*grins*

Right. silviakundera, author of the tres fabulous Fanfiction Classics in a Minute (check out her LJ there for these wonders), sent me an absolutely gorgeous manip for Syzygy.

Can I point out please how absolutely AWED it makes me what people can do with Adobe? My GOD. I block up these days just thinking of the WORD Adobe.

( cover )

*happy more*

*****

Recs

Tell by rivkat I'm not sure, but I suspect Rivka's main reason for writing is to see how very, very much she can creep us out. Can't prove it or anything. I'm good with this. I encourage the creepiness. And the hurtness of Lex. As long as I can fix him in my head. *hugs Lex* She's GOOD. And it hurts. Poor woobie.

Childhood Dreams by mobiusklein Not in the usual hysterical-funny, but thoughtful and bittersweet and CLexy. I likes muchly.

After the Storm by Caro. I can't actually remember if I recced it or just imagined I did, but it certainly can't hurt to read it again. Beautiful Clark POV and a lovely story.

*****

Places to Go

Spike on Fandom of Pain and Te on the same.

Te asks a cool question, though.

The Spike got me thinking about what I want from those shows, *and* what I want from those fandoms. And it goes all the way back to when I was a newbie in the X-Files fandom, absolutely gobsmacked by the presence of MSR types and noromos.

My attitude was, "Dude, you're pretty much getting this stuff *from the show*, why would you want more?"

Now, the people writing case files, I could understand. Because, wow! Exciting stuff! Maybe stuff that wouldn't get shown because it was too gruesome or intelligent. But... relationships that are either already onscreen or *will* be? (Maybe it's because I came in relatively late, but *I* never doubted that MSR would be onscreen. Fucking CC.)

Written in the same, happily-ever-after, fade-to-black, what the fuck happened to Scully's balls style?

What was the point?

I was in fandom for the what if, and I still am. To this day, 'missing scenes' bore me if they're written as well as they can be. (het, gen, or slash) To this day, I've yet to see a canonical relationship that I cared about enough to be truly fannish about it -- though Spuffy came pretty damned close.

Yet one more reason that the sheer existence of UCSL was once enough to make me want to strew flower petals and sing songs, and still makes me sigh happily.

I'm not saying that I don't want *any* romance on-screen -- though in my experience, a lot of writers *fuck it up*. I'm just saying that I like having room to play, and never understood people who wanted to color in the lines.

Or... who wanted to *only* color in the lines.

I can tell you why. *g*

It usually hits me after stuff like Insurgence or even Skinwalker. Or for that matter, when I was in movieverse reading Logan/Jean.

There's something absolutely comforting about falling in love with a pairing that you can be relatively sure isn't going to just rip you apart. This is a retrospective view, btw.

I started fanfic writing in very canon, episode extending, Paris/Torres het in ST: Voyager, and really, that's the least stressed I've been since. Also far less inspirational material sometimes, but--I never hit the levels I get in movieverse and not even close to what SV does to me on occasion. In both of the earlier fandoms, I had a main pairing that was my comfort zone, and I branched out from there when I felt like it. With Voyager, there was no real reason to believe P/T was breaking up anytime soon. With movieverse, I had a LOT of time before the next movie screwed up my universe. So. Levelness. It was a very real way to keep from being jossed, one, and two, very little worry about my pairing of choice becoming deadly enemies and depressing the hell out of me. Hell, Voyager's continuity was so bad I'm not entirely sure ANYONE could be seriously jossed up until the P/T wedding.

With that base, it made it very easy to play around with other pairings that I didn't have nearly as much an emotional investment in. Voyager, it was Paris/Seven, in movieverse, St. John/Bobby and a little Logan/Jean. I had my happy place, I was comfortable there, canon wasn't out to get me, so vive la multipairing joys and so forth.

Clark/Lex--it's very, very hard to write anything else, for me. And part of it is, yes, the show is never, ever, ever going to give me some nice, comforting, hot boys with apple-flavored oil sex. And I'm emotionally invested, which really, I should have known better, but on the other hand, Lex Luthor. Come on.

It's--not necessarily that anyone goes into fanfic thinking, I am going to write the pairing s/s because that's the canon one/non-canon one/cutest/het/slash/strange etc. Bethy once said she follows what hits her right, and that's pretty much how I do it. Clark/Lana had all the attraction of leftover school meatloaf, but even if it hadn't, Clark/Lex already had me. And this is from someone who has no actual talent for reading subtext whatsoever--I had to have it not only explained but demonstrated, and I spent a LOT of my first few weeks in the fandom finding out that Smallville's subtext is very atypical in its blatancy. It clicked for me, therefore, that's where I stayed.

Of course, now, I read slash into animation and OTP bizarre things, and wow, this is weird, but no matter.

I don't necessarily think that coloring inside the lines is limiting.

God, I suck at metaphors. Let me try to say this differently. To me, the limit's always been in the author who writes the stories, not the subject they choose to write about.

Wow, that was unexpectedly serious. I shall write jello smut now to clean my brain out.

*****

The Spam Updates

I am NOT in need of a lonely housewife. I do not want a hovering anything. And if it involves the carnal uses of livestock? Not interested. Also? No, I do NOT want to eat pizza and lose weight. When I eat pizza, I want it to be fattening as hell. Thank you. Go away.

How to get this across to the people that keep spamming me is the question.

*****

Weird Writing Moments

I know, everyone has this time, probably more than once, whereas they are innocently writing, say, a nice episode coda exercise, and then they look at it and think, huh, that's gone places it wasn't supposed to. On the order of asking for whipped cream and getting sour cream.

Or not. But I like bad and inappropriate metaphors.

You start off with a story idea. You start writing it and you write and you write and then your idea is somewhere in the next galaxy and what you have makes no sense whatsoever.

Yeah. That's how I'm feeling atm. Thank you pearl_o for your mockage of my annoyance with myself. As a single scene, the characterizations all feel about a full step off even loose canon, and I'm willing to admit I watch those boys through Jenn's Special CLex-Tinted Glasses. It just feels wrong, and I think I can figure out why, but it will be so complex.

And a thought to either destina or brighidestone, whoever said Ice Age was slashy? I blame you for the fact when I watched it today, I was wondering if the other mammoths would accept the mixed marriage and if a stable threesome with a sabretooth tiger was reallly that bad an idea.

*sighs*

I'm doomed. Oh yeah. Handbasket annny day now.

Thanks first:

I had a nice birthday, thank you all! And all the well-wishing was absolutely great. I'm trying to answer everyone, so bear with me. Thanks to the wonderfulSlodwick and my darlingBethy for the birthday pictures (squee!), Lex Luthor's Guide to Defrocking Superheros by d_v_8, which was just adorable, Hallway by bexless (and MAN was this hot, oh DAMN), and the lovely isilya made me a cover for No Step Had Trodden Black. liviapenn, being generous, offered me one Torture Clark For Free entry, which after tonight? Shall totally use.

Watch for the cut tags later tonight, chica. *eg*

And issaro, being another one of those whizzes with graphics (SV has a LOT of those), also sent me an absolutely stunning cover for Standing in the Common Spaces. *amazed*

( new bookcovers )

Recs:

Chloe: Year One by liviapenn She's a fic TEASE. A fascinating Alternate History Chloe in Gotham story, with so many damn POSSIBLITIES. TEASE, I tell you. An excellent story all around.

Scotch Gambit by rivkatIn which Rivka creeps me out and gives a terrible, fascinating story. Martha--huh. Originall recced as War Games in Rivka's Lj, it's up and posted. I suggest reading.

After by rageprufrock Okay, how I forgot to rec I have no idea, but this bit of post-Insurgence fic is just--right. Bitter, edgy, and--very real. *sighs*

Speak Loudly For Him by slodwick I love how Slodwick writes Chloe, and in this? Pitch perfect. Lovely an dsad and true to her character. And heartbreaking as hell.

Satisfying by sa. Um. Hot. With food. And kinks. *g*

Round One by rosenho Another hot one, with boxing. Lex and Helen, and seriously good.

Fortress of Dorkitude by mobiusklein *snickers* Um. I almost ruined a keyboard. Very funny bit of Clexness.

Webpage:

http://seperis.illuminatedtext.com is the new addy for my site. I've fixed more links, especially the Star Trek Voyager ones, but I'm still fixing the pointers to the stylesheets. Please report any broken links. I THINK I found them all and people have been very kind to email me to tell me when a link doesn't work. Very cool. Thanks for that, too.

Jennish Things:

I ended up rewriting my badfic rant in a fit of birthday snark (don't ask), and noted that if I replace 'meanness' with 'snark', I don't sound quite so vicious, but damn.

My love to pearl_o for my source of recent trauma. You. Are. Going. To. Hell. She's pretty much the pure indiluted inspiration, thanks to a cleverly given link with NO warning on what would be in store for me when I started reading.

rhiannonhero was talking a while back about guilty pleasure stories and why she reads them. I have a guilty pleasure FOLDER. I will admit I read these only in restricted chat with people I also can blackmail. It's quite a list.

There's--something deeply addictive about true badfic. And before anyone winces? Probably not about you. Trust me on this one.

( jenn snarks on badfic )
Huh. So I CAN rant in my LJ. Who knew? I think I tricked myself. Not that it's a rant. More like a cleansing. *G*

I shall think happy thoughts. I have the four disk LotR DVD (squee!) and chocolate cupcakes and generalized good moods going on. Not to mention a pound of candy. Mmmm. Candy.