Episode 7:
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Episode 8:
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Episode 9:
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Episode 10:
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Overall thoughts:
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Episode 8:
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Episode 9:
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Episode 10:
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Overall thoughts:
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Purrcy looks very *intent* but not necessarily *intelligent* because ... there was a MOTH! Flying much too high for him to even try grabbing, but a riveting prey item nonetheless. This was from a few weeks ago.

Turkey day is upon us!
E&P drove down from Boston yesterday during the day yesterday, though the last part had to be in the dark because the traffic got so heavy from Danbury on, and it was raining.
I'm feeling really good about having surrendered the spatula, because the fact is I'm going through a period where I'm in pain a lot. I guess I haven't mentioned this before, but in the past month or so I've developed tendonitis in my left shoulder, the one that works the cane, and also the one that controls the mouse--because I've got such long-standing pain and weakness in the *right* hand.
The pain often (usually?) wakes me up after not-quite-enough sleep, and it really drags me down.
elayna just mentioned Essentrics, which I can stream on NJ-PBS, and I'm going to try doing that 3 times a week and see if it helps. Otherwise I feel as though I'm gradually accumulating chronic pain vampires that are gradually sapping my ability to function. And I've got to find a way to beat them back other than "lie in bed for hours a day, under a heating blanket & cat, reading".
Menu this year, as last:
- roast spatchcocked chicken, plus turkey legs & thighs
- roasted garlic gravy
- Our Stuffing Recipe™
- roast veg, asst.
- "Indian Pudding"
- Our Cranberry Sauce™
- salad
- pumpkin pie, apple pie, whipped cream
Alas, my brother has a bad cold and won't be joining us. It's not COVID & not the flu, so there's that, but he's too snotty to travel. Since he won't be around I think I won't make turkey gumbo tomorrow, I'll just make stock, do the gumbo on Saturday.
Turkey day is upon us!
E&P drove down from Boston yesterday during the day yesterday, though the last part had to be in the dark because the traffic got so heavy from Danbury on, and it was raining.
I'm feeling really good about having surrendered the spatula, because the fact is I'm going through a period where I'm in pain a lot. I guess I haven't mentioned this before, but in the past month or so I've developed tendonitis in my left shoulder, the one that works the cane, and also the one that controls the mouse--because I've got such long-standing pain and weakness in the *right* hand.
The pain often (usually?) wakes me up after not-quite-enough sleep, and it really drags me down.
Menu this year, as last:
- roast spatchcocked chicken, plus turkey legs & thighs
- roasted garlic gravy
- Our Stuffing Recipe™
- roast veg, asst.
- "Indian Pudding"
- Our Cranberry Sauce™
- salad
- pumpkin pie, apple pie, whipped cream
Alas, my brother has a bad cold and won't be joining us. It's not COVID & not the flu, so there's that, but he's too snotty to travel. Since he won't be around I think I won't make turkey gumbo tomorrow, I'll just make stock, do the gumbo on Saturday.
Michael Grunwald, We Are Eating the Earth: The thing about land is that they aren’t making any more of it, and although you can make more farmland (for now) from forests, it’s not a good idea. This means that agriculture is hugely important to climate change, but most of the time proposals for, e.g., biofuels or organic farming don’t take into account the costs in farmland. The book explores various things that backfired because of that failed accounting and what might work in the future. Bonus: the audiobook is narrated by Kevin R. Free, the voice of Murderbot, who turns out to be substantially more expressive when condemning habitat destruction.
Tony Magistrale & Michael J. Blouin, King Noir: The Crime Fiction of Stephen King (feat. Stephen King and Charles Ardai): Treads the scholarly/popular line, as the inclusion of a chapter by King and a “dialogue” with Ardai suggest. The book explores King’s noir-ish work like Joyland, but also considers his horror protagonists as hardboiled detectives, trying to find out why bad things happen (and, in King’s own words, often finding the noirish answer “Because they can.”). I especially liked the reading of Wendy Torrance as a more successful detective than her husband Jack. Richard Bachman shows up as the dark side of King’s optimism (I would have given more attention to the short stories—they’re also mostly from the Bachman era and those often are quite bleak). And the conclusion interestingly explores the near-absence of the (living) big city and the femme fatale—two noir staples—from King’s work, part of a general refusal of fluidity.
Gerardo Con Diaz, Everyone Breaks These Laws: How Copyrights Made the Online World: This book is literally not for me because I live and breathe copyright law and it is a tour through the law of copyright & the internet that is aimed at an intelligent nonlawyer. Although I didn’t learn much, I appreciated lines like “Back then, all my porn was illegally obtained, and it definitely constituted copyright infringement.” The focus is on court cases and the arguments behind them, so the contributions of “user generated content” and, notably, fanworks to the ecosystem don’t get a mention.
Stephanie Burt, Taylor’s Version: The Poetic and Musical Genius of Taylor Swift: ( longer )
Kyla Sommers, When the Smoke Cleared: The 1968 Rebellions and the Unfinished Battle for Civil Rights in the Nation’s Capital: Extensive account of the lead-up to, experience of, and consequences of the 1968 riots after MLK Jr.’s assassination. There was some interesting stuff about Stokely Carmichael, who (reportedly) told people to go home during the riots because they didn’t have enough guns to win. (Later: “According to the FBI, Carmichael held up a gun and declared ‘tonight bring your gun, don’t loot, shoot.’ The Washington Post, however, reported Carmichael held up a gun and said, ‘Stay off the streets if you don’t have a gun because there’s going to be shooting.’”) Congress did not allow DC to control its own political fate, and that shaped how things happened, including the limited success of citizens’ attempts to direct development and get more control over the police, but ultimately DC was caught up in the larger right-wing backlash that was willing to invest in prisons but not in sustained economic opportunity. Reading it now, I was struct by the fact that—even without riots, fires, or other large-scale destruction—white people who don’t live in the area are still calling for military occupation because they don’t feel safe. So maybe the riots weren’t as causal as they are considered.
Tony Magistrale & Michael J. Blouin, King Noir: The Crime Fiction of Stephen King (feat. Stephen King and Charles Ardai): Treads the scholarly/popular line, as the inclusion of a chapter by King and a “dialogue” with Ardai suggest. The book explores King’s noir-ish work like Joyland, but also considers his horror protagonists as hardboiled detectives, trying to find out why bad things happen (and, in King’s own words, often finding the noirish answer “Because they can.”). I especially liked the reading of Wendy Torrance as a more successful detective than her husband Jack. Richard Bachman shows up as the dark side of King’s optimism (I would have given more attention to the short stories—they’re also mostly from the Bachman era and those often are quite bleak). And the conclusion interestingly explores the near-absence of the (living) big city and the femme fatale—two noir staples—from King’s work, part of a general refusal of fluidity.
Gerardo Con Diaz, Everyone Breaks These Laws: How Copyrights Made the Online World: This book is literally not for me because I live and breathe copyright law and it is a tour through the law of copyright & the internet that is aimed at an intelligent nonlawyer. Although I didn’t learn much, I appreciated lines like “Back then, all my porn was illegally obtained, and it definitely constituted copyright infringement.” The focus is on court cases and the arguments behind them, so the contributions of “user generated content” and, notably, fanworks to the ecosystem don’t get a mention.
Stephanie Burt, Taylor’s Version: The Poetic and Musical Genius of Taylor Swift: ( longer )
Kyla Sommers, When the Smoke Cleared: The 1968 Rebellions and the Unfinished Battle for Civil Rights in the Nation’s Capital: Extensive account of the lead-up to, experience of, and consequences of the 1968 riots after MLK Jr.’s assassination. There was some interesting stuff about Stokely Carmichael, who (reportedly) told people to go home during the riots because they didn’t have enough guns to win. (Later: “According to the FBI, Carmichael held up a gun and declared ‘tonight bring your gun, don’t loot, shoot.’ The Washington Post, however, reported Carmichael held up a gun and said, ‘Stay off the streets if you don’t have a gun because there’s going to be shooting.’”) Congress did not allow DC to control its own political fate, and that shaped how things happened, including the limited success of citizens’ attempts to direct development and get more control over the police, but ultimately DC was caught up in the larger right-wing backlash that was willing to invest in prisons but not in sustained economic opportunity. Reading it now, I was struct by the fact that—even without riots, fires, or other large-scale destruction—white people who don’t live in the area are still calling for military occupation because they don’t feel safe. So maybe the riots weren’t as causal as they are considered.
books
still reading: A Companion to Women in the Ancient World by Sharon L. James (Editor), Sheila Dillon (Editor). I did not expect this book to be so fucking triggery, so it's slow going.
Yuletide
I've reviewed canon a million times, inflicted canon on my beta (bless them), and now I'm rereading fic I wrote back in the day...trying to lure the muses back, I guess? IDK. I am blocked. I am stymied. I am in awe of my past self as a writer. I used to be so good! Now all that energy is going into crochet, or so it seems. I'm so frustrated. I mean, I should be able to do two things well, right? Creativity isn't a zero sum game. And yet. I'm really considering defaulting, even though I don't want to. I just can't seem to get my brain working. (I've never defaulted. I think this is my 20th? Yuletide & I don't want to break my streak, and yet. And YET.) :(((
yarning
Rockstar Lestat in the gold pants looks so GOOD! I'm so pleased. I've made him a little microphone out of wire and painted glitter onto his face. Not sure how much glitter to put on his chest, yet; the screencaps are inconsistent there. Could be the gold necklace is enough.

Yesterday I added wire rings to his index fingers, such as he has fingers, but this pic is from before that. Point is, I'm really happy with him so far. Maybe I'll keep him and make others to sell. Also, I went to yarn group Sunday and had a good time. Another new person came, and I worked on a gold and yellow kickbunny to replace the one that sold. A lot have sold in the last few weeks, which is great, as I need the $. And I just got a commission to make an orange fish cat kicker, so that'll be fun to work on over Thanksgiving.
etsy sale!
My Black Friday sale is here! Most things are 25% off, which is a deeper cut than is entirely reasonable, since I try to keep my prices as low as possible, but I really want some things to find their forever homes. Go to Sage's Handmade to have a look around. Also, commissions are open!
healthcrap
I've got to have yet another doc appt to fill out medical transportation forms, drat it all. ION my scale said that I'd lost 4 pounds last week alone, but! It turned out the ten year old scale was BROKEN. New scale came Sunday & proved the ridiculous weight drop was false, whew!
#resist
#50501 We (the People) Dissent Protests: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1f-30Rsg6N_ONQAulO-yVXTKpZxXchRRB2kD3Zhkpe_A/preview
#50501: Thanksgiving/Black Friday Boycott of Amazon, Target, and Home Depot
I hope all of y'all are doing wonderfully! Have a safe and happy holiday if you're in the US & a lovely week if you're elsewhere. <333
still reading: A Companion to Women in the Ancient World by Sharon L. James (Editor), Sheila Dillon (Editor). I did not expect this book to be so fucking triggery, so it's slow going.
Yuletide
I've reviewed canon a million times, inflicted canon on my beta (bless them), and now I'm rereading fic I wrote back in the day...trying to lure the muses back, I guess? IDK. I am blocked. I am stymied. I am in awe of my past self as a writer. I used to be so good! Now all that energy is going into crochet, or so it seems. I'm so frustrated. I mean, I should be able to do two things well, right? Creativity isn't a zero sum game. And yet. I'm really considering defaulting, even though I don't want to. I just can't seem to get my brain working. (I've never defaulted. I think this is my 20th? Yuletide & I don't want to break my streak, and yet. And YET.) :(((
yarning
Rockstar Lestat in the gold pants looks so GOOD! I'm so pleased. I've made him a little microphone out of wire and painted glitter onto his face. Not sure how much glitter to put on his chest, yet; the screencaps are inconsistent there. Could be the gold necklace is enough.

Yesterday I added wire rings to his index fingers, such as he has fingers, but this pic is from before that. Point is, I'm really happy with him so far. Maybe I'll keep him and make others to sell. Also, I went to yarn group Sunday and had a good time. Another new person came, and I worked on a gold and yellow kickbunny to replace the one that sold. A lot have sold in the last few weeks, which is great, as I need the $. And I just got a commission to make an orange fish cat kicker, so that'll be fun to work on over Thanksgiving.
etsy sale!
My Black Friday sale is here! Most things are 25% off, which is a deeper cut than is entirely reasonable, since I try to keep my prices as low as possible, but I really want some things to find their forever homes. Go to Sage's Handmade to have a look around. Also, commissions are open!
healthcrap
I've got to have yet another doc appt to fill out medical transportation forms, drat it all. ION my scale said that I'd lost 4 pounds last week alone, but! It turned out the ten year old scale was BROKEN. New scale came Sunday & proved the ridiculous weight drop was false, whew!
#resist
#50501 We (the People) Dissent Protests: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1f-30Rsg6N_ONQAulO-yVXTKpZxXchRRB2kD3Zhkpe_A/preview
#50501: Thanksgiving/Black Friday Boycott of Amazon, Target, and Home Depot
I hope all of y'all are doing wonderfully! Have a safe and happy holiday if you're in the US & a lovely week if you're elsewhere. <333
Ask a Manager: 2. My husband’s boss wants him to hire the boss’s girlfriend
This one was recently reposted but unfortunately I can't find the post. ( Read more... )
Work today was a lot, but I got done everything I needed to get done and got out. There are stories I could tell but I'm too tired right now to rehash some of the nonsense my coworkers get up to.
Tomorrow, I am heading out to the island for Thanksgiving, and also to see Baby Miss L. She turns three on Monday! THREE! How is that even possible!? (I'm sure I will be posting the same exact thing on Monday.) But they are not having a family party for her, just a friends party, since she has so many friends now! She is quite the social butterfly! So I've packed up the books and clothes that are her birthday gift (and 1 toy - a magnetic tile thing she can build things with), and tomorrow she can open her presents! They go to my niece's in-laws for Thanksgiving (so they spend Christmas day with us), so I might not see her on the day itself, but that's okay I guess, especially if I get some time tomorrow. Plus, middle niece is going to stop by since she is working on Thursday (she's a nurse), so I will get to see her as well. All in all a good time, I hope!
If I don't get a chance to post tomorrow, I hope everyone celebrating has a Happy Thanksgiving! And everyone else has a great Friday Eve, also known as Thursday.
*
Tomorrow, I am heading out to the island for Thanksgiving, and also to see Baby Miss L. She turns three on Monday! THREE! How is that even possible!? (I'm sure I will be posting the same exact thing on Monday.) But they are not having a family party for her, just a friends party, since she has so many friends now! She is quite the social butterfly! So I've packed up the books and clothes that are her birthday gift (and 1 toy - a magnetic tile thing she can build things with), and tomorrow she can open her presents! They go to my niece's in-laws for Thanksgiving (so they spend Christmas day with us), so I might not see her on the day itself, but that's okay I guess, especially if I get some time tomorrow. Plus, middle niece is going to stop by since she is working on Thursday (she's a nurse), so I will get to see her as well. All in all a good time, I hope!
If I don't get a chance to post tomorrow, I hope everyone celebrating has a Happy Thanksgiving! And everyone else has a great Friday Eve, also known as Thursday.
*
Last month I had 4 external hard drives and my husband convinced me to buy a new hard drive to replace my two oldest drives. So I did what most people do and I went to Amazon and bought a Seagate Expansion 22TB hard drive. It arrived in the retail box on my front porch, which was kind of weird, and I'm glad I was home because it required zero effort to figure out what was delivered.
My concern then became is this a safe way to transport external hard drives? So I started down the internet research rabbit hole to figure out if this was a safe way to transport these types of drives and how to verify that the hard drive wasn't physically damaged in transport.
( cut for the rest of the post )
My concern then became is this a safe way to transport external hard drives? So I started down the internet research rabbit hole to figure out if this was a safe way to transport these types of drives and how to verify that the hard drive wasn't physically damaged in transport.
( cut for the rest of the post )
Quinn Slobodian, Hayek’s Bastards: Race, Gold, IQ, and the Capitalism of the Far Right: ( it's always racism )
Corinne Low, Having It All: What Data Tells Us About Women's Lives and Getting the Most Out of Yours: ( self-help from an economist )
Cory Doctorow, Enshittification: Why Everything Suddenly Got Worse and What to Do About It: ( Doctorow in fine form )
Tim Wu, The Age of Extraction: How Tech Platforms Conquered the Economy and Threaten Our Future Prosperity: ( Another account of enshittification )
Kim A. Wagner, Massacre in the Clouds: An American Atrocity and the Erasure of History: ( written by the victors )
Mary Roach, Replaceable You: Adventures in Human Anatomy: ( strange but true )
Corinne Low, Having It All: What Data Tells Us About Women's Lives and Getting the Most Out of Yours: ( self-help from an economist )
Cory Doctorow, Enshittification: Why Everything Suddenly Got Worse and What to Do About It: ( Doctorow in fine form )
Tim Wu, The Age of Extraction: How Tech Platforms Conquered the Economy and Threaten Our Future Prosperity: ( Another account of enshittification )
Kim A. Wagner, Massacre in the Clouds: An American Atrocity and the Erasure of History: ( written by the victors )
Mary Roach, Replaceable You: Adventures in Human Anatomy: ( strange but true )
Great interview about Murderbot:
Bifurcating Character with Incisive and Witty Inner Monologue: a Masterclass with ‘Murderbot’ Co-Showrunners Paul Weitz and Spirit Awards Winner Chris Weitz
Since SecUnits issued by the Corporation Rim (a group of mega-corporations ruling the galaxy in the distant future) are sentient, complete obedience to human orders is guaranteed by the “governor module” in each unit. However, Murderbot (Alexander Skarsgård, who nabbed an Emmy for his intricate and chilling performance in the HBO series, Big Little Lies), figures out how to disable its module to gain autonomy. “Murderbot is sentient from the get-go — it’s basically a slavery narrative. It’s important to Martha that Murderbot was always sentient,” Chris says of the close collaboration with consulting producer, Wells. “All the SecUnits are under human control. They can think for themselves but can’t act for themselves. So, they experience this torture of being at the disposal of others.” In addition to exploring themes of humanity and free will, the series also calls into question the issue of personhood, as Paul notes: “To what degree are we going to grant personhood to non-human intelligence?”
https://www.filmindependent.org/blog/bifurcating-character-with-incisive-and-witty-inner-monologue-a-masterclass-with-murderbot-co-showrunners-paul-weitz-and-spirit-awards-winner-chris-weitz/
***
I'm trying to get back into the swing of things after basically three weeks of travel in October, catching up on household stuff, trying to get ready for the holidays, getting back into working on the current book. I think I was more mentally exhausted than physically, but it was still a lot.
I didn't stay more than a day in any one city (except for two nights in Allentown, PA, which was lovely) and I was mostly leaving before most of the hotels started to serve breakfast, so I was living on a lot of airplane food. I did get to ride the train for the first time in the US (the Acela Amtrack) which was fun. I've ridden trains in Sweden, the Netherlands, and Scotland, but never here.
There was a lot of emotional overwhelm, seeing so many people, but also it felt really good, because they were all people who cared about books and art and creativity. The smallest crowd was in New York, about 40-50 people, the largest was in Seattle with around 300. The Texas Book Festival in Austin was like an encapsulation of the whole trip, being in a giant crowd of people (the largest in the festival's 30 year history) who were all "books, books, books!" I've heard that people seemed to be going to more arts-related events lately, and that was what I saw on my trip.
Bifurcating Character with Incisive and Witty Inner Monologue: a Masterclass with ‘Murderbot’ Co-Showrunners Paul Weitz and Spirit Awards Winner Chris Weitz
Since SecUnits issued by the Corporation Rim (a group of mega-corporations ruling the galaxy in the distant future) are sentient, complete obedience to human orders is guaranteed by the “governor module” in each unit. However, Murderbot (Alexander Skarsgård, who nabbed an Emmy for his intricate and chilling performance in the HBO series, Big Little Lies), figures out how to disable its module to gain autonomy. “Murderbot is sentient from the get-go — it’s basically a slavery narrative. It’s important to Martha that Murderbot was always sentient,” Chris says of the close collaboration with consulting producer, Wells. “All the SecUnits are under human control. They can think for themselves but can’t act for themselves. So, they experience this torture of being at the disposal of others.” In addition to exploring themes of humanity and free will, the series also calls into question the issue of personhood, as Paul notes: “To what degree are we going to grant personhood to non-human intelligence?”
https://www.filmindependent.org/blog/bifurcating-character-with-incisive-and-witty-inner-monologue-a-masterclass-with-murderbot-co-showrunners-paul-weitz-and-spirit-awards-winner-chris-weitz/
***
I'm trying to get back into the swing of things after basically three weeks of travel in October, catching up on household stuff, trying to get ready for the holidays, getting back into working on the current book. I think I was more mentally exhausted than physically, but it was still a lot.
I didn't stay more than a day in any one city (except for two nights in Allentown, PA, which was lovely) and I was mostly leaving before most of the hotels started to serve breakfast, so I was living on a lot of airplane food. I did get to ride the train for the first time in the US (the Acela Amtrack) which was fun. I've ridden trains in Sweden, the Netherlands, and Scotland, but never here.
There was a lot of emotional overwhelm, seeing so many people, but also it felt really good, because they were all people who cared about books and art and creativity. The smallest crowd was in New York, about 40-50 people, the largest was in Seattle with around 300. The Texas Book Festival in Austin was like an encapsulation of the whole trip, being in a giant crowd of people (the largest in the festival's 30 year history) who were all "books, books, books!" I've heard that people seemed to be going to more arts-related events lately, and that was what I saw on my trip.
I'm revisiting Petrichor (I'd gotten busy after the second episode and didn't get around to picking it back up until now).
Episode 3:
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Episode 4:
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Episode 5:
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Episode 3:
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Episode 4:
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Episode 5:
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Hugh Howey, Wool: ( underground dystopia )
Stephanie Burgis, Wooing the Witch Queen: ( meet cute )
R.F. Kuang, Katabasis:( hell is other academics )
Qntm, There Is No Antimemetics Division: ( fighting a war you can't remember )
Mia Tsai, The Memory Hunters: ( memory and mushrooms )
John Scalzi, R. F. Kuang, Peng Shepherd, Kaliane Bradley, Olivie Blake, P. Djèlí Clark, The Time Traveler’s Passport: ( short stories )
Francesca Serritella, Ghosts of Harvard: ( ghosts or just mental illness? )
V. E. Schwab, A Darker Shade of Magic: ( world hoppers )
Stephanie Burgis, Wooing the Witch Queen: ( meet cute )
R.F. Kuang, Katabasis:( hell is other academics )
Qntm, There Is No Antimemetics Division: ( fighting a war you can't remember )
Mia Tsai, The Memory Hunters: ( memory and mushrooms )
John Scalzi, R. F. Kuang, Peng Shepherd, Kaliane Bradley, Olivie Blake, P. Djèlí Clark, The Time Traveler’s Passport: ( short stories )
Francesca Serritella, Ghosts of Harvard: ( ghosts or just mental illness? )
V. E. Schwab, A Darker Shade of Magic: ( world hoppers )
Dear Care and Feeding,
I’m 19 and in university. I recently broke up with my boyfriend, “Jason.” He’d been acting weird for a few weeks, but when I ended things, he completely flipped out.
It escalated to the point where he slipped into my family’s home, stole our cat, “Flibble,” and tried to hold him for ransom. We did get Flibble back, and Jason is now facing charges. I just want to put this all behind me.
My parents, however, are furious. They keep telling me I should “have better judgment” and promise I’m going to get an earful this Thanksgiving about “choosing appropriate partners.” I get it, this got bad. But Jason wasn’t showing signs of being unhinged when we first started dating, and I did break up with him as soon as he started acting erratically. Still, my parents chew me out every time we talk and have started calling two or three times a week specifically to lecture me.
It’s driving me crazy. I don’t want to block them or cut them out of my life, but I also don’t want to deal with this anymore. What can I do to get them to lay off?
—Stepped In It
( Read more... )
I’m 19 and in university. I recently broke up with my boyfriend, “Jason.” He’d been acting weird for a few weeks, but when I ended things, he completely flipped out.
It escalated to the point where he slipped into my family’s home, stole our cat, “Flibble,” and tried to hold him for ransom. We did get Flibble back, and Jason is now facing charges. I just want to put this all behind me.
My parents, however, are furious. They keep telling me I should “have better judgment” and promise I’m going to get an earful this Thanksgiving about “choosing appropriate partners.” I get it, this got bad. But Jason wasn’t showing signs of being unhinged when we first started dating, and I did break up with him as soon as he started acting erratically. Still, my parents chew me out every time we talk and have started calling two or three times a week specifically to lecture me.
It’s driving me crazy. I don’t want to block them or cut them out of my life, but I also don’t want to deal with this anymore. What can I do to get them to lay off?
—Stepped In It
( Read more... )
Dear Meghan: I have an 8-year-old daughter. She does not have a mother (my husband and I are both men). She doesn’t particularly like shopping for clothes, but she has a relative who keeps her very well stocked with jumpsuits, dresses and girly outfits of all kinds, which is the type of clothing she typically likes. In general, I let her decide for herself how to mix and match the various clothes she has each morning and will only step in if something is really inappropriate.
My mother, however, feels the need to criticize her clothing choices nearly every time she sees her. “Oh dear, you should never mix prints!” or “Why didn’t you wear a different shirt under that jumpsuit — it really doesn’t match at all!” My mother blames me for what she sees as my inability to teach a girl about girls’ fashion.
I told her that I had indeed talked about some of these rules, but I thought my daughter should also be able to make her own choices about how to dress. She then accused me of being a bad parent and suggested that I would also “give up” if faced with a child who stole or cheated on a test. Is it really so wrong to refuse to have a daily struggle because my daughter went to school with shorts that lightly clashed with her shirt?
— Grandma’s Criticisms
( Read more... )
My mother, however, feels the need to criticize her clothing choices nearly every time she sees her. “Oh dear, you should never mix prints!” or “Why didn’t you wear a different shirt under that jumpsuit — it really doesn’t match at all!” My mother blames me for what she sees as my inability to teach a girl about girls’ fashion.
I told her that I had indeed talked about some of these rules, but I thought my daughter should also be able to make her own choices about how to dress. She then accused me of being a bad parent and suggested that I would also “give up” if faced with a child who stole or cheated on a test. Is it really so wrong to refuse to have a daily struggle because my daughter went to school with shorts that lightly clashed with her shirt?
— Grandma’s Criticisms
( Read more... )
Dear Meghan: My sons (5 and 6 years old, both mildly autistic) tend to wake up in the morning and as fast as they can dive into my husband’s and my bed for cuddles. They seem to get a lot of sensory satisfaction and a lot of comfort from this ritual. Their preference would be to cuddle with me or both of us for about 15 minutes until they’re all the way awake, then run off and do their own thing. I don’t mind this at all — I enjoy it somewhat, and I find that (as primary caretaker) their days and thus mine go much smoother if they have this cuddle in bed to start the day.
The problem is that my husband says it ruins his day to have his kids in his bed at all.
I have tried to be a physical barrier between him and them — doesn’t work. I’ve tried to not let them in until he’s already up and showering — doesn’t work. I’ve tried to go to their beds and cuddle them there — doesn’t work. I’m out of ideas.
What should I do?
( Read more... )
The problem is that my husband says it ruins his day to have his kids in his bed at all.
I have tried to be a physical barrier between him and them — doesn’t work. I’ve tried to not let them in until he’s already up and showering — doesn’t work. I’ve tried to go to their beds and cuddle them there — doesn’t work. I’m out of ideas.
What should I do?
( Read more... )
1. When I say goodbye to my mother-in-law, she frequently traps me in extended hugs. They often last longer than 15 seconds! During these hugs, she rattles off compliments that are probably well-meaning, but which I take as insults: She’s grateful that I’m a good cook for my husband, for instance, and that I keep our house so clean. My husband and I are both working professionals. We split the housework evenly, and I’m proud of that. My husband says that his mother’s comments are just her way of trying to connect with me. But is there a way to dodge her hugs? That’s when the so-called compliments begin.
DAUGHTER-IN-LAW
( Read more... )
****
2. Dear Carolyn: We are a very small family — just me, my older sister and my parents. Five years ago, my sister married into a very large family, and her in-laws host all the holidays. We’re always invited, but it’s never any fun for us. There are 20 of them together, talking and laughing, and me and my parents in the corner by ourselves.
I’ve honestly tried to join in, but they’re always talking among themselves about people I don’t know. I ask them about their lives, and they go on and on, but when it’s time for me to talk, I get either cut off or ignored. They try to be nice, but after the third or fourth attempt to answer a question, you can tell they don’t care about the answer.
So I’ve decided I’m not going for Thanksgiving or Christmas this year. On Thanksgiving, some of my friends are meeting up for a hike in the morning, and then there’s a pub crawl later in the evening, and that’s enough holiday for me. I can order a pizza for dinner. For Christmas, I plan to have breakfast with my parents, open gifts and then kick back for the rest of the day while they go off to my sister’s in-laws’ house.
Even though my parents agree about the in-laws, they are telling me to suck it up and go for their sake. They and my sister are really upset with me, saying I’m going to ruin their holidays, hurt my brother-in-law’s feelings and not see my niece. I say there will be so many people around that my brother-in-law and niece won’t miss me, and I’ll see them both on Black Friday and then again on Christmas Eve, so it’s not like I’m missing out entirely.
Am I being selfish like they say? Don’t I have a right to enjoy my holidays, or do I have to suffer in silence?
— Anonymous
( Read more... )
*************
3. Dear Annie: My son got married about eight months ago, and while I truly do love his new wife, I admit I'm scratching my head over a few things. Maybe it's the times changing, or maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but it feels like I got a fourth child instead of a daughter-in-law.
When they come over for dinner, I do what I've always done: make a nice meal, fix everyone a plate and pass the rolls. I'll serve my husband, my boys and even the dog if he looks hungry enough. But my new daughter-in-law? She piles food on her own plate, sits down and tells my son to get it himself. My jaw nearly hit the mashed potatoes. He works all day to provide for her, and the least she could do is hand him a pork chop! Instead, I find myself jumping up to fix his plate while she's scrolling through her phone.
And the laundry, don't even get me started. Because they don't have a washer and dryer, she brings her clothes over, and somehow, I end up doing them. It's like my son got married, and I gained another load of towels.
Should I speak up, or just keep folding her laundry and praying she buys a washing machine? -- Lost For Words in Georgia
( Read more... )
**********
4. Dear Annie: Hoping you can offer some advice! My son has been married for six years to a beautiful girl who rarely speaks to us and acts as though we don't exist. Her distance has gotten much worse over time, and we have no idea why. We love her and are just as kind to her as we are to our other kids and their wives. My husband and I are so sad. This has broken our hearts.
We haven't said anything because we don't want to upset our son, but lately even he appears unhappy with her attitude toward us. When we've referred to her as our daughter -- as we do our other daughter-in-law, who loves the title -- she'll say, "No, thank you. I already have a mom and dad." We've always felt as parents ourselves that you can NEVER have too many people to love your child, so we were quite hurt by that.
And that's just the tip of the iceberg. She's so cold and distant toward us that even our friends and family have noticed and commented. We are good people, we stay out of our kids' business and we keep our opinions to ourselves. Our motto is, "If you want our thoughts, you'll have to ask for them." We don't meddle or cause waves ever, yet she continues to find ways to fault us for things. It's completely unsubstantiated, but it persists!
It's to the point I have so much anxiety that I've considered seeking out a therapist. This DIL is so unapproachable, so to avoid conflict, we just sweep EVERYTHING under the rug to avoid causing our sweet son any grief.
Please let us know if you have any advice. Our hearts are broken! -- Boy Momma
( Read more... )
DAUGHTER-IN-LAW
( Read more... )
2. Dear Carolyn: We are a very small family — just me, my older sister and my parents. Five years ago, my sister married into a very large family, and her in-laws host all the holidays. We’re always invited, but it’s never any fun for us. There are 20 of them together, talking and laughing, and me and my parents in the corner by ourselves.
I’ve honestly tried to join in, but they’re always talking among themselves about people I don’t know. I ask them about their lives, and they go on and on, but when it’s time for me to talk, I get either cut off or ignored. They try to be nice, but after the third or fourth attempt to answer a question, you can tell they don’t care about the answer.
So I’ve decided I’m not going for Thanksgiving or Christmas this year. On Thanksgiving, some of my friends are meeting up for a hike in the morning, and then there’s a pub crawl later in the evening, and that’s enough holiday for me. I can order a pizza for dinner. For Christmas, I plan to have breakfast with my parents, open gifts and then kick back for the rest of the day while they go off to my sister’s in-laws’ house.
Even though my parents agree about the in-laws, they are telling me to suck it up and go for their sake. They and my sister are really upset with me, saying I’m going to ruin their holidays, hurt my brother-in-law’s feelings and not see my niece. I say there will be so many people around that my brother-in-law and niece won’t miss me, and I’ll see them both on Black Friday and then again on Christmas Eve, so it’s not like I’m missing out entirely.
Am I being selfish like they say? Don’t I have a right to enjoy my holidays, or do I have to suffer in silence?
— Anonymous
( Read more... )
3. Dear Annie: My son got married about eight months ago, and while I truly do love his new wife, I admit I'm scratching my head over a few things. Maybe it's the times changing, or maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but it feels like I got a fourth child instead of a daughter-in-law.
When they come over for dinner, I do what I've always done: make a nice meal, fix everyone a plate and pass the rolls. I'll serve my husband, my boys and even the dog if he looks hungry enough. But my new daughter-in-law? She piles food on her own plate, sits down and tells my son to get it himself. My jaw nearly hit the mashed potatoes. He works all day to provide for her, and the least she could do is hand him a pork chop! Instead, I find myself jumping up to fix his plate while she's scrolling through her phone.
And the laundry, don't even get me started. Because they don't have a washer and dryer, she brings her clothes over, and somehow, I end up doing them. It's like my son got married, and I gained another load of towels.
Should I speak up, or just keep folding her laundry and praying she buys a washing machine? -- Lost For Words in Georgia
( Read more... )
4. Dear Annie: Hoping you can offer some advice! My son has been married for six years to a beautiful girl who rarely speaks to us and acts as though we don't exist. Her distance has gotten much worse over time, and we have no idea why. We love her and are just as kind to her as we are to our other kids and their wives. My husband and I are so sad. This has broken our hearts.
We haven't said anything because we don't want to upset our son, but lately even he appears unhappy with her attitude toward us. When we've referred to her as our daughter -- as we do our other daughter-in-law, who loves the title -- she'll say, "No, thank you. I already have a mom and dad." We've always felt as parents ourselves that you can NEVER have too many people to love your child, so we were quite hurt by that.
And that's just the tip of the iceberg. She's so cold and distant toward us that even our friends and family have noticed and commented. We are good people, we stay out of our kids' business and we keep our opinions to ourselves. Our motto is, "If you want our thoughts, you'll have to ask for them." We don't meddle or cause waves ever, yet she continues to find ways to fault us for things. It's completely unsubstantiated, but it persists!
It's to the point I have so much anxiety that I've considered seeking out a therapist. This DIL is so unapproachable, so to avoid conflict, we just sweep EVERYTHING under the rug to avoid causing our sweet son any grief.
Please let us know if you have any advice. Our hearts are broken! -- Boy Momma
( Read more... )
My mother-in-law is always on a diet. Her house also happens to be where the family gathers monthly for meals. Lately, she has been serving lighter fare and no dessert so that she can eat more healthfully. We are fine with the lighter meals, but when we pushed back on dessert, she got upset and said we weren’t being supportive of her. These meals represent a tiny fraction of what she eats in a year, and I am frustrated that I have to compromise on dessert. (It doesn’t help that her diets are usually fads and not based in science.) Advice?
( Read more... )
( Read more... )
( spoilerly thoughts in no particular order )
I might end up making icons for this show at some point.
I might end up making icons for this show at some point.
Dear Carolyn: My boyfriend is still in regular contact with his ex-girlfriend. He is her confidant, and she admits she still loves him. He keeps her posted on our relationship, which is rocky because I am jealous of their relationship. I am not allowed to set any boundaries about this.
I want to ask him to stop being her confidant and to stop telling her about our relationship. They can remain friends, just not with such intimate conversations. He absolutely refuses any boundaries because “I am not going to let you pick my friends.”
Should I just exit this situation? For context, he and I are on and off because of this, and he usually dates her again when we are off.
— Jealous
( Read more... )
I want to ask him to stop being her confidant and to stop telling her about our relationship. They can remain friends, just not with such intimate conversations. He absolutely refuses any boundaries because “I am not going to let you pick my friends.”
Should I just exit this situation? For context, he and I are on and off because of this, and he usually dates her again when we are off.
— Jealous
( Read more... )
I just watched that HBO documentary about Billy Joel and though it is long and a little repetitive in some ways, I thought it was well worth watching. I learned a lot that I never knew about him.
In a brief work update, they did finally announce the new CEO on Thursday, but for some reason*, the current board chair refused to give a quote for the press release, so they had the person we think is going to be the new board chair (still a secret for some reason!) give a quote instead.
*now my boss and I are speculating that she had backed a different candidate for the job and is taking it personally that she did not get her way, but that is absolutely just speculation and may be unfair to her. We just can't think of another reason why she's been so weird about the whole thing.
Yesterday was busy with committee meetings, and I logged off at about 4:45 and crashed hard into a two-hour nap, and then slept nine hours when I went back to bed for the night.
I can't believe Thanksgiving is this Thursday. Where did this entire year go?
***
In a brief work update, they did finally announce the new CEO on Thursday, but for some reason*, the current board chair refused to give a quote for the press release, so they had the person we think is going to be the new board chair (still a secret for some reason!) give a quote instead.
*now my boss and I are speculating that she had backed a different candidate for the job and is taking it personally that she did not get her way, but that is absolutely just speculation and may be unfair to her. We just can't think of another reason why she's been so weird about the whole thing.
Yesterday was busy with committee meetings, and I logged off at about 4:45 and crashed hard into a two-hour nap, and then slept nine hours when I went back to bed for the night.
I can't believe Thanksgiving is this Thursday. Where did this entire year go?
***
Dear Annie: I've always had a complicated relationship with my older sister, "Beth." She's the golden child -- successful, pretty, everyone's favorite. I'm more of the quiet one. I've never resented her accomplishments, but I've spent years feeling like I'm living in her shadow.
Recently, something strange happened. I got offered a promotion at work that would put me in a leadership role over a project Beth's company is contracted on. It's a huge opportunity. When I told my parents, they were polite but not enthusiastic. My mom actually said, "Well, let's hope that doesn't make things awkward for Beth."
Beth hasn't said much, just a text that said "Congrats," with a period. Not even an exclamation point.
Part of me wants to let it go and focus on the win. But another part of me feels really, really sad, like I'm still chasing approval I'll never get. I don't want this old family dynamic to steal the joy from something I worked hard for.
How do I celebrate myself without needing my family to do it with me? And is it worth trying to fix something that maybe they don't even think is broken? -- Out of the Shadow
( Read more... )
Recently, something strange happened. I got offered a promotion at work that would put me in a leadership role over a project Beth's company is contracted on. It's a huge opportunity. When I told my parents, they were polite but not enthusiastic. My mom actually said, "Well, let's hope that doesn't make things awkward for Beth."
Beth hasn't said much, just a text that said "Congrats," with a period. Not even an exclamation point.
Part of me wants to let it go and focus on the win. But another part of me feels really, really sad, like I'm still chasing approval I'll never get. I don't want this old family dynamic to steal the joy from something I worked hard for.
How do I celebrate myself without needing my family to do it with me? And is it worth trying to fix something that maybe they don't even think is broken? -- Out of the Shadow
( Read more... )
The Sunblade of the Ceredada (100 words) by Laura JV
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The Goblin Emperor Series - Katherine Addison
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Csethiro Ceredin/Maia Drazhar
Characters: Csethiro Ceredin, Maia Drazhar
Additional Tags: Drabble
Summary:
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The Goblin Emperor Series - Katherine Addison
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Csethiro Ceredin/Maia Drazhar
Characters: Csethiro Ceredin, Maia Drazhar
Additional Tags: Drabble
Summary:
A conversation.
Friday, November 21st, 2025 02:50 pm
Thanksgiving isn't even here yet and I'm already annoyed
Here is the lowdown, this year for Thanksgiving I traveled from Alaska to Texas. That part went well.
The part that annoys me is my mom just told me one of my aunts and uncles plan to attend Thanksgiving and they plan to watch football in the living room. My mom's house has an open floor plan so the dinning area, the kitchen, and living room are all in the same space. They are planning on at least 12 people attending this party.
The biggest problem beyond my own irritation at that level of rudeness is that I can't hear well when there are too many competing noises and I've noticed over the years I don't do well with crowds or too much noise.
I'm like why the fuck are you even visiting people if you plan to watch TV? They could stay home and do that, or show up for an hour two, then leave to go home and watch TV. There is no visiting and catching up if someone's attention is focused on a TV show. Also why does "football" get a pass on family holidays in terms of what is played on TV but not other shows?
I was sort of looking forward to catching up with aunts, uncles, and cousins, but not sure that's going to happen. It's hard enough talking when there are a lot of people around and there is just conversation happening, but add in TV noise and it's just unbearable. I'll probably eat and bail. Too much noise stresses me out. I already told mom when I get overwhelmed I'm leaving the party to go hide out away from the noise.
Which is what I did a lot of when I was growing up, parties with large groups of people make me miserable. Small gatherings are fine but I think after 10 people it's just too much.
The part that annoys me is my mom just told me one of my aunts and uncles plan to attend Thanksgiving and they plan to watch football in the living room. My mom's house has an open floor plan so the dinning area, the kitchen, and living room are all in the same space. They are planning on at least 12 people attending this party.
The biggest problem beyond my own irritation at that level of rudeness is that I can't hear well when there are too many competing noises and I've noticed over the years I don't do well with crowds or too much noise.
I'm like why the fuck are you even visiting people if you plan to watch TV? They could stay home and do that, or show up for an hour two, then leave to go home and watch TV. There is no visiting and catching up if someone's attention is focused on a TV show. Also why does "football" get a pass on family holidays in terms of what is played on TV but not other shows?
I was sort of looking forward to catching up with aunts, uncles, and cousins, but not sure that's going to happen. It's hard enough talking when there are a lot of people around and there is just conversation happening, but add in TV noise and it's just unbearable. I'll probably eat and bail. Too much noise stresses me out. I already told mom when I get overwhelmed I'm leaving the party to go hide out away from the noise.
Which is what I did a lot of when I was growing up, parties with large groups of people make me miserable. Small gatherings are fine but I think after 10 people it's just too much.
[In-Person Escapade 36] Price Increase and Hotel Benefits
Hello Escapaders!
Registered for Escapade 36? Check!
If not, get your reg in soon! The price increases from $135 to $150 after Sunday, Nov 23rd at 11:59pm PST.
https://escapadecon.net/escapade-36-registration-in-person/
Hotel reservation made? Check!
If not, head over here for our booking link:
https://escapadecon.net/hotel-travel/
Booking with our link gets you many benefits, including discounted room rates, discounted parking ($25 per night versus $66 per night!), free cancelation up to the day before, a refund on check out of the mandatory $12.92 per night tax, and a reduced deposit (capped at $250 for the whole stay). Plus, you support Escapade!
You’ll know you’re booking with the Escapade link as the Quick Book button will also say: "Rcgc Escapade". If you're not seeing the "Rcgc Escapade" on the Quick Book button for the dates you want, or if the room type you want to book is unavailable, let us know ASAP! We'll work with the hotel to increase availability.
If you've already booked, check your confirmation email from Hilton and make sure it says: "Your Rate Information: RCGC ESCAPADE" to verify that you'll receive our negotiated benefits.
-Con Com
https://escapadecon.net/escapade-36-price-increase-and-hotel-benefits/
Dear Carolyn: My stepdad died suddenly of a heart attack two years ago, and my mom let me move in with her. Her place is huge, so she doesn’t want to live there alone. She can’t sell the house because she didn’t really inherit it; she can live there until she dies, then it goes to my stepbrother. My mom doesn’t charge me rent; she said I should save and invest the money instead, so it’ll be there when I do get a place. She doesn’t try to run my life, and I have plenty of room, plus there’s a pool, sauna, tennis court, etc., so it’s a great deal and we both benefit.
This arrangement makes my dad and stepmom crazy. They keep telling me it’s hurting me since I’m not living in the “real world.” And they complain that they can’t visit me at my home. My parents are okay with each other but haven’t been in the same room since my college graduation six years ago. My mom and stepmom don’t get along. But I go over to their house all the time, so it’s not interfering with our relationship.
My dad and stepmom even made my little sister ask why I’m living still with my mom — because no way a 15-year-old is asking that on her own.
I am banking money, I cook for myself a lot of the time and do my own laundry. With work, dating, getting enough exercise and sleep, life is hard enough. Why should I deliberately make it harder on myself just to prove a point? How do I shut them down while staying on good terms?
( Read more... )
This arrangement makes my dad and stepmom crazy. They keep telling me it’s hurting me since I’m not living in the “real world.” And they complain that they can’t visit me at my home. My parents are okay with each other but haven’t been in the same room since my college graduation six years ago. My mom and stepmom don’t get along. But I go over to their house all the time, so it’s not interfering with our relationship.
My dad and stepmom even made my little sister ask why I’m living still with my mom — because no way a 15-year-old is asking that on her own.
I am banking money, I cook for myself a lot of the time and do my own laundry. With work, dating, getting enough exercise and sleep, life is hard enough. Why should I deliberately make it harder on myself just to prove a point? How do I shut them down while staying on good terms?
( Read more... )
Here's my tree, and this is what I'm requesting this year:
- Grimm
- 镇魂 | Guardian (TV)
- Grimm/Guardian crossover
- 镇魂 | Guardian RPF
- Legend of the Seeker
- Sherlock (BBC)
- 绅探 | Detective L
- 山河令 | Word of Honor, 天涯客 | Faraway Wanderers
- Once Upon a Time in Wonderland
- Chinese fic recs
- food or cooking icons
ETA: Sign-ups here!
Totally forgot to post yesterday, oops?
books
Cinder House by Freya Marske. This book was all over the place, like it didn't know what it wanted to be, and that undermined a really interesting take on Cinderella.
The Last Devil to Die (Thursday Murder Club #4) by Richard Osman. Really satisfying.
yarning
It's Secret Santa season, so I've been extremely busy shipping orders, doing commissions (carrots!), and making more kickbunnies and such for my shop. I also figured out how to offer Made to Order items, so I started with the calico cat stitch scarf. No takers yet, but it's good to be clear on the process. I went to yarn group Sunday and we had record-breaking turnout, yay! I've also made progress on Rockstar Lestat, though I've also had several setbacks, drat it all, including the yarn I picked for the gold pants not being at all gold enough. I did find a no-id skein that will work instead, but I wish I had a clue what brand it is, much less the colorway. And I decided on an axolotl for niece's xmas, which I've just now finished. Also, after an embarrassingly long search, I found my ziploc of embroidery floss specific to doll making. And the scarf on the left in the icon sold yesterday, yay!
( healthcrap )
I hope you're all having a lovely week! I may take a small nap. <333
books
Cinder House by Freya Marske. This book was all over the place, like it didn't know what it wanted to be, and that undermined a really interesting take on Cinderella.
The Last Devil to Die (Thursday Murder Club #4) by Richard Osman. Really satisfying.
yarning
It's Secret Santa season, so I've been extremely busy shipping orders, doing commissions (carrots!), and making more kickbunnies and such for my shop. I also figured out how to offer Made to Order items, so I started with the calico cat stitch scarf. No takers yet, but it's good to be clear on the process. I went to yarn group Sunday and we had record-breaking turnout, yay! I've also made progress on Rockstar Lestat, though I've also had several setbacks, drat it all, including the yarn I picked for the gold pants not being at all gold enough. I did find a no-id skein that will work instead, but I wish I had a clue what brand it is, much less the colorway. And I decided on an axolotl for niece's xmas, which I've just now finished. Also, after an embarrassingly long search, I found my ziploc of embroidery floss specific to doll making. And the scarf on the left in the icon sold yesterday, yay!
( healthcrap )
I hope you're all having a lovely week! I may take a small nap. <333
ClaireBell is very intense, but really good so far imho! I really like the acting, writing, and cinematography.
( Read more... )
( Read more... )
According to Gateworld, Amazon (which owns the franchise now *sighs*) has greenlighted a new Stargate series! And it's not a reboot!
I was never into SG-1, and I still resent Brad Wright and Joe Mallozzi for the way they ditched SGA in favour of SGU, dumped on SGA's female fans, and then were offended when SGA fans weren't interested in SGU. But I really loved Stargate Atlantis. It was my main fandom for many years, and I have so many fond memories both of the show and the fandom. I haven't rewatched it in a while, but it's one of the things on my list that I definitely want to go back to when I have some time and no energy for new stuff.
My main ship was McShep, but even more than that, Sheppard was my favourite character, and I loved reading Sheppard gen. My secondary ship - a tiny pool noodle of a rarepair - was Teyla/Bates, and I still wish it had been more popular. (Maybe if I'd written fic myself? Unlikely, but ... *g*)
Still, even though I was very active in SGA - I co-ran
sga_newsletter, co-modded
mcshep_match and
mensa_au and
teyla_bates, among other things - I never wrote any fic for it. Part of it is that I got into SGA during my three-year writers' block (which Doctor Who eventually broke), but even afterwards, despite my brain being constantly full of scenarios, they never crossed that line into writing. Possibly in part because the fandom was big and kept me busy! But surely that can't explain it entirely, and I'm honestly not sure what other reasons there might be. (Why do some fandoms never make me write? A mystery for the ages! *g*) Anyway, it'll be interesing to see, when I eventually rewatch again, whether that'll change ...
And it's very unlikely the same magic will happen twice, but when/if a new Stargate show does happen, unless the premise is itself unappealing, I'm absolutely giving it a chance.
I was never into SG-1, and I still resent Brad Wright and Joe Mallozzi for the way they ditched SGA in favour of SGU, dumped on SGA's female fans, and then were offended when SGA fans weren't interested in SGU. But I really loved Stargate Atlantis. It was my main fandom for many years, and I have so many fond memories both of the show and the fandom. I haven't rewatched it in a while, but it's one of the things on my list that I definitely want to go back to when I have some time and no energy for new stuff.
My main ship was McShep, but even more than that, Sheppard was my favourite character, and I loved reading Sheppard gen. My secondary ship - a tiny pool noodle of a rarepair - was Teyla/Bates, and I still wish it had been more popular. (Maybe if I'd written fic myself? Unlikely, but ... *g*)
Still, even though I was very active in SGA - I co-ran
And it's very unlikely the same magic will happen twice, but when/if a new Stargate show does happen, unless the premise is itself unappealing, I'm absolutely giving it a chance.
Wednesday, November 19th, 2025 11:19 am
Surely you invoke the negative energy that's effecting the vibes???
The yoga studio where I teach hasn’t been paying me on time (AAM: 4th one down):
I’ve been teaching yoga for about four years now and was hired for my first job at this small group training facility. I teach once a week and often sub for one of the two other instructors. I previously got paid monthly. I have a full-time job and this is my side gig. So, it’s money I use for things like gifts, or save up for vacations.
Over the last two years, my monthly payment stretched to being paid every two months. This past year, it’s stretched out to being paid every four or five months. I’ve asked the owners several times to leave a check for me for next week. I’ve also asked if there is an easier way for them to pay me, such as Venmo or direct deposit.
I’m at the point now where I’m owed for over 21 classes ($40 per class). Enrollment in the small training groups seems to have dropped as I’m seeing new members less. People do join for the yoga-only package to come to the yoga classes. What’s the best way to ask to be paid and let them know I can’t/shouldn’t have to wait longer than two months for payment? I’m at the point now where I want to say that I won’t teach until I get paid, but that isn’t really my vibe.
Alison responds: ( saying that you won’t teach until you get paid should be your vibe )
1) I got water in one ear in my shower yesterday that has still not cleared. So I feel a lot of pressure in my head and it's given me a headache all day. (I have been trying all the recommended ways to clear it; no luck.)
2) Our ground-floor bathroom is being painted -- which, yay for being aaaaaaalmost done with the renovations, my god I cannot wait. But one of the painters has been coughing a lot, which may be nothing (I mean, I have a persistent cough myself, plus I just saw out of my office window him going out for a smoke, which sure could explain it), but nonetheless Geoff and I have been staying upstairs in our offices, which means I haven't done a bunch of things I might have done downstairs.
Ah, I see from my window that the painters are leaving, so we'll let the air filter downstairs run a while longer and then I can go start on food prep and other downstairs things. Also I can go look at which the bathroom looks like! We had to change our choice of flooring at the last minute and I spent five seconds going, yeah, I think the paint we chose to go with the old floor choice will go with the new one, sure, why not! because I could not face starting the color choice process over from scratch, and anyway it's not like we use that bathroom a lot, and if we hate it we can repaint it. Later. Much later.
And in the meantime I will take some ibuprofen and pull at my earlobe some more.
2) Our ground-floor bathroom is being painted -- which, yay for being aaaaaaalmost done with the renovations, my god I cannot wait. But one of the painters has been coughing a lot, which may be nothing (I mean, I have a persistent cough myself, plus I just saw out of my office window him going out for a smoke, which sure could explain it), but nonetheless Geoff and I have been staying upstairs in our offices, which means I haven't done a bunch of things I might have done downstairs.
Ah, I see from my window that the painters are leaving, so we'll let the air filter downstairs run a while longer and then I can go start on food prep and other downstairs things. Also I can go look at which the bathroom looks like! We had to change our choice of flooring at the last minute and I spent five seconds going, yeah, I think the paint we chose to go with the old floor choice will go with the new one, sure, why not! because I could not face starting the color choice process over from scratch, and anyway it's not like we use that bathroom a lot, and if we hate it we can repaint it. Later. Much later.
And in the meantime I will take some ibuprofen and pull at my earlobe some more.
DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend recently moved in with me, and ever since then, my cat’s behavior has completely changed. She’s been acting out: scratching furniture, hiding for hours and even refusing to eat sometimes. She used to be calm and affectionate, but now she seems anxious and territorial. My partner is trying to be patient, but I can tell he’s getting frustrated, especially since the cat hisses at him whenever he walks by or tries to sit near me. It’s creating tension between us, and I feel stuck in the middle trying to keep everyone happy. I’ve tried introducing them slowly, giving the cat space and even buying new toys to distract her, but nothing seems to help. My boyfriend thinks I’m overreacting and that the cat will “get over it,” but I know she’s genuinely stressed.
I feel guilty because I was so excited for us to finally live together, and now it feels like we’re both walking on eggshells around my pet. I love them both, but I’m starting to wonder if this living situation is sustainable. How can I help my cat adjust to this big change without it putting more strain on my relationship? -- Standoff
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I feel guilty because I was so excited for us to finally live together, and now it feels like we’re both walking on eggshells around my pet. I love them both, but I’m starting to wonder if this living situation is sustainable. How can I help my cat adjust to this big change without it putting more strain on my relationship? -- Standoff
( Read more... )