seperis | it's like all i know of science is a dirty, filthy, methody lie

Oh My God

My son is totally going to clone this thing. I can feel it.

Excerpt: Named Titanoboa cerrejonensis, the snake would have weighed 1,140 kilograms (2,500 pounds) and measured 13 meters (42.7 feet) nose to tail tip -- dwarfing the largest modern pythons and anacondas which can grow to 6 meters (19.5 feet).

Scientists believe it slithered around the planet between 58 and 60 million years ago.

Geologist David Polly, who identified the position of the fossil vertebrae which made a size estimate possible, said in a statement Wednesday: "At its greatest width, the snake would have come up to about your hips. The size is pretty amazing.

Forty two feet long and CAN SLITHER BY AT WAIST LEVEL.

Why in the name of God am I reading CNN tech about the future destruction of mankind?

Right, it's because I cannot face my bathroom. Here is what I have learned. A carpet shampooer set to "Suck all that water up" does not, in fact, suck the water up, no matter how long you crouch beside it in hope. A lot of hope. Perhaps an excessive amount of hope.

I am just--*looks helpless*. I don't know. When I woke up this morning, snakes from mythology were still being mocked by scientists. Now, a thing I'm pretty sure I read about Apollo killing (Or Xena?) exists. I just want everyone to mull that while contemplating dragons.

I also have an uncomfortable feeling the thing I am not writing that does not involve any research into any Roman emperors may in fact not be interestingly dark so much as really creepily wrong.

You see how my life is a shambles. With snakes.

OH!

New default icon courtesy of

unamaga, who gave me two Arthur icons I totally am not drooling over and is made. Of. Win. I am going to contemplate his prettiness, now, kthx.

You need carpet blowers, probably rentable, but fucking noisy as all hell.

Also, I am afeared of that article because someone at the scifi original movie dept is totally gonna read that.

Someone in the sci-fi department had an orgasm to end all orgasms and will not know why until he reads CNN.

I still like the part with Iceland.

Creepily wrong in what way? Other than orgies involving Merlin, which would mostly just baffle him into hysteria.

Iceland just--why Iceland? I swear to God, the ambassador got a crush on him and went home to conquer it in his name or something. There is no other reasonable explanation.

I really like that idea. Mostly for the thunderous look on Uther's face (if he's still alive for this).

Also, the story got very bizarre when perhaps my insomnia caused me to double the word count around four this morning.

OOOH TELL ME MORE! (I'm on email if that works better)

Invited to googledocs? Invite should be in your gmail.

*chews lip* It is *creepy*. In a very overthinking sort of way.

Yup, got it. *bops off to check out*

The happy story I was reading last night?

Well, THEY CLAIM that there will not be giant snakes as the climate changes because their habitat is being destroyed, but who is to say they couldn't ADAPT to other climates. *shifty eyes*

LIES.

You will LOVE this. As one walks into the Allen Library, there is a skeleton of a prehistoric crocodile hanging on the wall above your head. It is 28 feet long. Today, the largest living crocodiles reach about 20 feet.

:)

You need the ShamWow!

...what?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwRISkyV_B8

IT'S FROM GERMANY!

Also, if you have time, watch the slapchop one! I came *very* close to changing my lj name - except somebody had already taken it.

STOP HAVING A BORING LIFE! YOU'RE GONNA HAVE AN EXCITING LIFE NOW! YOU'RE GONNA LOVE MY NUTS!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUbWjIKxrrs

Hmm. *bookmarks*

Trust me, just watching them will improve your day.

do you know anybody with a ShopVac? it's a wet/dry vacuum, and when the basement in my old house would flood at every third rainstorm, my parents would drag it down and suck up all the water. it wouldn't get things dry, but it would get them non squishy.

I used it! To get up the standing water. We just have the wet carpet. It got some of it up, but not really that much, so we switched to the shampooer, which *is* getting it up, but very slowly, since it's not used to that much water.

*sends water dryup vibes your way*

Also, I saw that about that snake the other day and couldn't help but wonder how long it'll be before bad b-scifi movies are made about it.

Arthur is always so, so purty!

Yes. *glows at Arthur* Yes, he is. He could fight a giant snake. He could totally kick its ass.

But wouldn't be funny if he started to fight said Giant Snake only to find out it is Merlin's pet!? :P

The giant snake is pretty awesome.

You may need to pull up the carpet at one edge and get one of those giant blow dyer things. I wonder if hardware stores rent them...

*nods* I need to look into that soonish, before mildew sets in.

Holy Cow.

My son is totally going to clone this thing. I can feel it.

Can he do that? *worries*

Your icon is very pretty.

Forty two feet long and CAN SLITHER BY AT WAIST LEVEL

I wrote that exact kind of snake in a fic months back and it actually exists? That is really worrying.

Forty two feet long and CAN SLITHER BY AT WAIST LEVEL.

GREAT. NEW NIGHTMARES. ;P

There was an article on that snake in our local paper ... please tell me you've seen David Hewlett's "Boa vs. Python"?

If not, make haste to the video store. *G* It's awful and yet ...

(If you can't bring yourself to watch it, you can live vicariously here: A Battle of Massive Scales (http://laceymcbain.livejournal.com/190970.html) and Crotch Cobra Vs. One-Eyed Trouser Snake (http://laceymcbain.livejournal.com/191454.html))

Hee! BvP is awesomely bad! Watched the version without the edits, bringing to mind that, considering this snake is at waist level, technically it would not truly have to go down on a girl the one in the movie did...

*shudders* I'm SO not thinking about that ...

The question is not whether Sci-Fi will make a movie out of the snake thing, but a) will it star SGA cast members, and b) when will the crossover fic be written?

Wasn't there a DH movie with a giant snake? Hmm...

And also, they have those shammy things that might blot up wanter on a small scale, but I vote for fans, open doors and a commercial carpet cleaner machine. Good luck!

~L

Oh, yes, yes there was. See my above comment for scary links. *g*

maybe creepily dark AND wrong? sounds good!
adding to the pretty boy on your new icon, dark, creepy and wrong sounds all kind of awesome!

*kicks whatever is responsible for the state of your bathroom*

Proving once and for all that paleontology is the tiniest world ever, I know the guys who found the giant snake. If it comforts you at all, I'm working on getting them to swear that no cloning of that thing will ever occur in my lifetime. This might be trickier than it sounds, given that blackmail material that would make any sane person quiver and repent just makes paleontologists go, "Yeah, so? I did that last week at a meeting, too."

I fear that our budding love affair may come to a screeching halt when I admit that I like snakes.

:(

Oooh.

My son is totally going to clone this thing. I can feel it.

Can I place in an order for one when he does? I like snakes! And it'll be perfect to feed people that piss me off to.

Also, sorry to hear about your pipes. At least you can be happy it was just water. It could have been worse. Considering it was flooding from the bathroom, it could have been sewage. *shudders at the flashbacks*

I also have an uncomfortable feeling the thing I am not writing that does not involve any research into any Roman emperors may in fact not be interestingly dark so much as really creepily wrong.

...I am intrigued.

Also? Dragons = awesome.

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