episode review: sga 4.5 Travellers

PONY! PONY! PONY WITH A BRIDLE AND A PUPPY ON ITS BACK!

Yes. God. Yes.



Note: John squee. This cannot be new to anyone who has ever been at this lj.

Oh. I mean--this is slightly differnet from the sudden shocking climactic--yeah, okay, now I'm making myself uncomfortable, but really. I just--this is why I love John.

God, I loved this.

I will express my love in rambles. Basically because it's easy and I like easy. We will frame my love in the musical stylings of Cher.

My Squee Is Loud and Proud:

Anytime John is kidnapped, I feel sure life gets better. This was nice. It just is. I like him with Rodney, et al, but he's quirky when they get him on his own, and we just don't see enough of that. All that sarcasm and acting like he barely has any idea what a spaceship is and you know, completely making them stare in horror and wonder what kind of humans are letting this guy out on his own. And I love how no one has in the history of this show other than his team has caught on to that. It just kills me.

I love the fact that half the time he drifts through the ship acting like he has the brains of a celebutante. I love the fact that Lyran knows he's just fucking with them because he can and she still can't quite reconcile what she knows to how he acts for most of the damn show. I love that he's reckless because he's that absolutely sure he can pull it off.

John and Ship:

I love they told him to fly and he's such an asshole he had to spend a second to explain how extremely stupid they were not to ask about inertial dampeners before he played with the pretty new ship. (I swear to God Rodney in his lab had this miniorgasm when that happened and still has no idea why.)

Actually. Watching John feel up Ancient tech never stops being incredibly hot. I loved the fact that he took some time and turned Morse code, knowing of course Rodney was looking for him. I seriously giggled my way through watching John sprawl across the brig looking bored out of his mind while they stare at him and wonder if he's nuts. Because he is. And because she's just picking up that what you see is not what you get, she sends them up to find out what the hell he did besides remind them of a few laws of physics.

Interesting note: this is the first time we've had so much canonical confirmation of the amount of control someone has of an Ancient ship using the interfaces from a single place (conclusions can be extrapolated to Atlantis). He locked her in teh chair room and then disabled all power fairly quickly when she started getting feisty from auxilary without all that much visible effort. And for that matter, that he figured out so quickly how to do it.

John and the Chair:

I cannot express how a show called The Chair and John would be my favorite episode of all time. Jesus. Then he jumps up and fixes it. I--think I blacked out or something. God. Damn. Yes.

John and Lyran:

I'm taking a deeply unpopular stance. I liked them. I liked her. I mean, yes, she kidnapped him and beat him up and blackmailed him and I still just--okay, one, I could sort of squint and see where she was coming from in terms of desperation and limited supplies. It's also this: they're a lot alike. They're soldiers, working to protect their people, doing what's necessary for survival and preservation. Except for this one place that John came to a skidding stop pre-Atlantis when he balances his people's lives against it. She's willing to sacrifice her own people for this ship, and in the same position, John wouldn't. It makes an interesting contrast, and the first time he actually looked uncomfortable when he mentioned that he didn't anticipate her willing to kill her two men just to stop him. She's not Wraith or Genii; he could see himself (his people) in her and it was a little moment of dissonance he filed away.

But I did like her. They were alike; reckless, a little desperate, willing to play astronomical odds because they were actually that sure they could win, and that they both had reasons for it and for that matter, damn good reasons.

I like he's attracted to her for reasons that makes sense to his character, unlike God help us all Chaya. I love that she took the stunner and he wasn't even surprised, just so damned annoyed. And I love that because he's John, he always tries to make an alliance when he finds one.

She won the ship eventually, but only after she stopped trying to judge him by what she *thought* he was and started paying attention to who he was, and it's still funny it took her most of the show to figure that out. And also took a fleet of her own ships along with her to be sure. And I liked the fact that she wanted him to stay, and that she respected the fact he couldn't and let him go.

And I found them very, very, very hot.

I have totally lost my slash cred, haven't I?

Randomly

1.) John fixing the intership communications. Fixing the chair. Getting communications to send a signal. Looking them in the eye and saying he has no idea what reverse engineering means. That just--I love him. So. Much.

2.) Her point about shooting too early. I am easy. That will never stop being funny.

3.) He did that flippy thing with the gun. HE HAS WAITED HIS WHOLE LIFE TO USE THAT MOVE. SQUEE!

4.) The fact he's having the time of his life with this shiny warship and fucking with them. He is. There's this part of me that suspects John realized very early in his life that being underestimated and then screwing with people later is possibly the most fun a person can have in their lives. In another life, he's an FBI agent undercover as a former male model or something and destroying drug czars while he nods, wide-eyed and innocent while destroying their bases one by one and no one has caught on. His superiors cry every time they read his reports of cleaning Columbia through the power of sarcasm one base at a time. And they still have no idea how to explain to the president how this is happening.

Once, this guy blew his cover? John took a nap with his cat and his copies of Golf Digest. Everyone came in to stare at him with their guns, and John yawned and no one could believe it. He laughs about that a lot.

Other

Rodney was adorable with his WE WILL NEVER FIND HIM which we all know actually means, I will sneak into the infirmary, steal some uppers, and track his ass across the galaxy and hey, we need a lojack on his ass.

Ronon's we will find him, period, stop, is always fun. Because this is Ronon and let's all face it; who really, really has the nerve to contradict that? Fleets of Wraith ships, Ronon does not see the problem.

Lorne: you have officially earned undying love. Right now. I even forgive you for trying to frag him becaue that was fucking *funny*.

Note to Rodney: yes, it was a woman, and she was very, very hot. But. I'm pretty sure I can guess who taught John how to rewire a chair, hotwire a communications array, mock his captors with his superior intelligence, and wait patiently knowing he'll be found.

*happy*

I love my show so much. God. I cannot, cannot lve this show more.



ETA: Okay, after being stunned by seeing lj reactions, note. Squee post. Lots of squee. Pages of squee. Please do not snap at my squee.

Comments

[seperis.livejournal.com]

*mulls*

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

He's got little bits of white powder crusted at the corners of his nostrils, and is giving them a perfectly "what?" expression. Then he sort of licks his lips a little and goes all bonelessly lax while staring at Mendoza. "You come to play?" Rubs the inside seam of his tight jeans a little. "'Cause you know how I get." Little pinch of his nose with the other hand and a light sniff. He's just a brainless slut. Mendoza just gives a sharp shake of the head to his minions and they file out. Carlos was just trying to make trouble, maybe even distract him ... Mendoza'd love to hang around for a quick blowjob because, seriously, slut. But he's got a number-two guy that needs his head taken off his shoulders.

Too bad he doesn't know the propane tank's been rigged to blow, and he'll be too busy on a wild goose chase to stop it.

[seperis.livejournal.com]

If there was ever a time John loved his work, it was....

"Holy shit!"

Stretching, John pulls on his jeans, wandering to the window to watch in interest as a small fire becomes a much larger one. Leaning on the windowsill, he pulls out his cell and dials one handed. "Hey. Need a pick up."

From the other side, John hears Rodney groan softly. "Will we need haz-mat suits to get you out?"

John squints when the next explosion send a gout of fire toward the roof of the house. "Probably. House on fire. Gotta run. Dinner?"

"Why did I take this job?" Rodney mutters irritably. "Okay, got your location. Wait. The house is on fire?"

"Kind of." John blinks at the ceiling and goes to teh closet, grabbing his bag and going into the hall. "Thai?"

"You're nuts. Chinese."

"Cool."

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

John suffers impatiently through Rodney's field medic inspection in the back of the chopper.

He'd been able to make it to the rendezvous on his own, even after slowing down to get Mendoza's labrador out of the house. The guy was a fuck, but it wasn't the dog's fault. Luckily Mendoza and company had been focused on figuring out how to save the stash in the storehouse with a mysteriously near-empty cistern.

The damp bandana around John's face to keep out the stench of burning drugs doesn't wipe off all the powder when he pulls it down, and Rodney stares at his nose with a frown.

"Do you need to pee in a cup?" he snaps, already lifting up an eyelid with his thumb to peer at John's pupils.

John pulls his head back. "No! It's just ... decoration," he adds with a pout. Christ, like he would've insisted he was flying the next leg if he were coked up. He wipes his nose self-consciously.

"Well, excuse me if you look like a dissolute rentboy." Rodney's moved on to checking pulse.

"Glad to see that Word-a-Day calendar's working for you," John shoots back, and so, okay, maybe he's a little sensitive about the get-up. It's not like jeans that tight are comfortable, and the mesh muscle tank and gauzy white shirt aren't really his thing. They're tools for the job, but he's not going to be crying over the scorch stains ruining the outfit. He'll feel more like himself when he gets back to his usual relax fits and geek T, but even better will be the way Rodney unclenches and gets it that it's him again.

Until then Rodney's stripping as much as he can off under the excuse of checking for burns, and John gives him a pro forma scowl. They're barely first-degree burns, but it makes Rodney feel better to fuss about putting ointment on, and John doesn't really mind it. Not after six weeks of people whose touch made his skin crawl.

John snags a radio headset. Against a backdrop of muttered words like ridiculous and heroics and idiot, he reports the compound's current situation to the teams flying in. Clean up should be fairly easy, with the cartel's vehicle fleet all on flat tires.

He lies back and lets Rodney tend to him. He's out, he's done. Mendoza's on his way to prison and the coke is ashes. The adrenaline crash and relief hit at the same time. He laughs out loud.

Rodney interrupts his latest monologue to stare. "What?"

John gives him the widest grin in the world. "It was a really cool explosion."

One corner of Rodney's mouth twitches up. "Hmph. Are you sure you're not high?"

[seperis.livejournal.com]

*g* AWWWW!

It was totally an awesome explosion.

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

Rodney will computer model it. *g* For John. For Christmas. *g* *g*

[manderkitty.livejournal.com]

Just...please? more?

[seperis.livejournal.com]

Version 2:

He spoke shitty Spanish, smiling like he knew everything there was to know; he was easy with a quickie behind the bar. A week later, Juarez had him in a Bogota penthouse, spreading him out on silk sheets at five grand a week and cheap at that price.

He's pretty and easy and likes it hard and likes it fast; sex, cars, planes, name it and John wants it. It's always more, not enough, but John fucks like he was made for it, green eyes closed and head back, words caught between his teeth; one day, Juarez is going to make him scream. Juarez blows off work and takes him shopping in Rio, fucks him in four countries and wakes up Panama from a five day bender and a small, slim woman sitting by his side with a cherry-red smile and a knife at his throat.

"FBI," she says and Juarez looks at the TV across the room that broadcasts on a thousand stations the fall of his empire.

He'll see John in a thousand faces and a thousand dreams but only one more time in life; a trial, a room, and a man who sits on the stand and drawls names and dates and places, sprawled like a man in a bed in a city that Juarez hasn't seen in years.

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

Ew. I mean hot. But also, ew! Also? Holy fuckity.

[seperis.livejournal.com]

*g* It was one of JOhn's early cases.

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

Before he met Rodney. Before Rodney hacked his records. Before John's handler on that case suffered a humiliating career downfall, instigated nobody's quite sure how. :-D

[seperis.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I coudl write it for you if you want.

*looks at word thoughtfully*

The first time Dr. Rodney McKay met Special Agent John Sheppard, he wasn't Dr. McKay and John was Michael Torres, but this was balanced, in Rodney's view, by the orgasms. The second time was a lot trickier.

(That a good start?)

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

*grabby hands* YES! GOOD START!

[cathexys.livejournal.com]

You two!!!

I just went in 15 different fantastic directions with these snippets!!!

Jenn, love the last line of version two and the first line of your hopefully new AU :D

[seperis.livejournal.com]

OH my GOD. DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY RANDOM WIPS I HAVE?

*hyperventilates into paper bag*

[anatsuno.livejournal.com]

*adds own weight to pressure?*

I am entirely behind Cathexys on this one. :D

[seperis.livejournal.com]

John sighs and Rodney hears footsteps circle the chair. A second later, Rodney's staring at the person he'd last seen naked and sweaty. God, Rodney realizes, appalled: I ate Thai food off that body. "Breathe," John says, looking amused. Rodney glares, trying not to be distracted by the fact he's almost sure John's still wearing eyeliner.

Right. Professional. Dropping the bag on the floor, Rodney wonders what on earth he can possibly say now. "So. You're the one running this?" Because suit or not, ten hours ago, Rodney saw this guy in leather pants and something that by no stretch of the imagination could be considered a shirt. "Aren't you a little old for clubbing?"

John's mouth quirks. "Aren't you a little old to be picking up rentboys?"

Might have been a mistake to drop the bag. Rodney settles on outrage. "Do they know--"

"I was *working*," John answers, mouth twitching. "Until you ran off my contact and, if I remember correctly, promised me a good time. By the way, fifty will not buy a *handjob* in DC, just so you know."

[cathexys.livejournal.com]

OMG

*dead*

rentboy's my bulletproof plot kink and sadly there's so litrtle in SGA!!!

[seperis.livejournal.com]

"I spent all of 1989 living above a bar in Seattle," Rodney tells John as John makes the little broach light up. It's disgusting. Rodney hates the FBI. "I carried on conversations with Einstein, my dog, three aliens that Star Trek never discovered, and my great uncle Martin, who used to be a go-go dancer named Martina. My girlfriend was pink and had wings; later, I found out she was my boyfriend and that explained a lot about why I spent so much time on my back. And that is *still* less insane than this moment."

"You have really heartwarming stories of your youth," John says easily as he sets it down for Rodney to pounce on, even though like the last ten times, once it stops touching John Sheppard, it turns off. There's an obvious sexual metaphor in this that Rodney can't bring himself to use quite yet; he's waiting for the perfect moment.

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

♥ ♥ ♥

I just never know what's going to come out when you open up yourRodney opens up his mouth.

THINGS I LOVE. THAT'S WHAT.

[anatsuno.livejournal.com]

*asdgjfgsldkfgdfkjhfkhdfghgGLEEE*

[skeddy-kat.livejournal.com]

I would read any of these any time and consider myself lucky.

[zoniduck.livejournal.com]

Nnnnggghhhh... Can I just tell you how happy I am that you're actually writing this? Judging by the snippets, you'll either be touted as the greatest thing since sliced bread, or drummed out of the fandom as some kind of deviant. Oh wait! "Some kind of deviant" is the definition of 99% of the people in this fandom. Carry on then.

[kkpixie.livejournal.com]

OMG, These are all lovely!

I love rentboy stories so. Also, the sending a junkie to fuck drug dealers part? Woah. So good, so John, and it made my little black heart squeeze.

More, more! *offers cookies*

[mercurydraconix.livejournal.com]

I.. I.. okay, I just got 'hold of this because I only just now watched Travellers, but you should, y'know, continue this, and post it to your LJ in it's entirety. YOU REALLY REALLY SHOULD.