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Friday, April 28th, 2006 09:11 am
my life could be dilbert
Signs I've Been At This Job Too Long
Well, there are a lot of them, but I can kind of nutshell the entire experience by a set of conversations I had yesterday. Short version of recent history, we have new security procedures for access to certain social services programs. So some of us have to have new forms filled out. Some of us have managers who are as lost as we are in how to fill them out.
However, I had an Idea.
Me: Sign this.
Manager: *signs, then blinks* You didn't fill this out.
Me: I'm going to try and take over the agency from the inside of the system. But I don't want you to get in trouble when I pull off my bloody coup, so I am going to not let you see me do it. Plausible deniability.
Manager: And you are doing this by...
Me: *beams* Becoming System Admnistrator.
Manager: *squints* I don't think you can coup with that.
Me: There's always a first time.
My first instinct, upon staring at the multiple acronyms that mean something, was to checkmark everything and just see what they do with it. The thing is, bureaucracy's greatest gift is the fact that very few people can see any kind of big picture and line of blame. You just have to know the language of bureaucracy. Which I most certainly do not. But I am willing to learn.
My second choice for security level is program automation or Data Control Admnistrator, both having a line-edit access and the ability to monkey around with the guts, as well as direct database editing. I'd like to say I'd do this for noble purposes, but the truth is, I wouldn't do anything with it. It's like having a secret. I just want to know, not do anything interesting with it.
Later, in O's office:
Me: Come on. Bringing down the Man!
Him: You are part of the Man. You work for the Man. Also, it'll red flag when we send it up and I like having a paycheck.
Me: But until it does, we will *rule the universe*.
Him: Or a single program in one agency in Texas.
Me: ...it's a small universe.
Much Later:
Him: *gives me corrected forms* Here you go.
Me: *sulking* I see I will not be a sword for justice to the little man.
Him: Coffee?
Me: Yes. Please. With extra sugar.
It's nice when people know and understand your real priorities.
Hmm. Okay, rabbits ditto, lizard ditto, and insomnia per night has increased. I'm actually worried at this point--I'm averaging six hours a night on a long night, and as little as three on a bad one. The bigger problem with this, other than my sudden waltz into low key insanity, is my concentration is seriously shot, and it's not like it was all that great before.
But. Weekend! Sleep! I am very excited.
So, anyone have anything interesting happening?
Well, there are a lot of them, but I can kind of nutshell the entire experience by a set of conversations I had yesterday. Short version of recent history, we have new security procedures for access to certain social services programs. So some of us have to have new forms filled out. Some of us have managers who are as lost as we are in how to fill them out.
However, I had an Idea.
Me: Sign this.
Manager: *signs, then blinks* You didn't fill this out.
Me: I'm going to try and take over the agency from the inside of the system. But I don't want you to get in trouble when I pull off my bloody coup, so I am going to not let you see me do it. Plausible deniability.
Manager: And you are doing this by...
Me: *beams* Becoming System Admnistrator.
Manager: *squints* I don't think you can coup with that.
Me: There's always a first time.
My first instinct, upon staring at the multiple acronyms that mean something, was to checkmark everything and just see what they do with it. The thing is, bureaucracy's greatest gift is the fact that very few people can see any kind of big picture and line of blame. You just have to know the language of bureaucracy. Which I most certainly do not. But I am willing to learn.
My second choice for security level is program automation or Data Control Admnistrator, both having a line-edit access and the ability to monkey around with the guts, as well as direct database editing. I'd like to say I'd do this for noble purposes, but the truth is, I wouldn't do anything with it. It's like having a secret. I just want to know, not do anything interesting with it.
Later, in O's office:
Me: Come on. Bringing down the Man!
Him: You are part of the Man. You work for the Man. Also, it'll red flag when we send it up and I like having a paycheck.
Me: But until it does, we will *rule the universe*.
Him: Or a single program in one agency in Texas.
Me: ...it's a small universe.
Much Later:
Him: *gives me corrected forms* Here you go.
Me: *sulking* I see I will not be a sword for justice to the little man.
Him: Coffee?
Me: Yes. Please. With extra sugar.
It's nice when people know and understand your real priorities.
Hmm. Okay, rabbits ditto, lizard ditto, and insomnia per night has increased. I'm actually worried at this point--I'm averaging six hours a night on a long night, and as little as three on a bad one. The bigger problem with this, other than my sudden waltz into low key insanity, is my concentration is seriously shot, and it's not like it was all that great before.
But. Weekend! Sleep! I am very excited.
So, anyone have anything interesting happening?
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From:Dogs often are quite afraid of thunder. And, when a honkin' big thunderstorm happens in the middle of the night, they think nothing of trying to crawl into bed with you so that you can comfort them.
Now that this picture is firmly in your mind, try to find some pity in your heart, and not cackling laughter, when I tell you to imagine my friend who owns three 200+ pound, massively drooling mastiffs--who are really, really afraid of thunder--and I mention that there was a huge thunderstorm the other night....
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From:Which means getting up at 4:30.
On a day where the show goes until at least dark. Gah.
At least the Sunday hours are 11-5.
And I get to leave early today, after admin-supplied going-away party cake and me-supplied birthday cake. Neither of which are actually for me, but I get to reap the benefits.
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From:Me: Come on. Bringing down the Man!
The Man: *smack-down* *smack-down* *smack-down*
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