things that put stuff in perspective

So I told Child about the entire gall bladder/surgery/removal, and two things came up; one I expected, and one that....

Child: Can I go with you and watch?

Me: Sure, you get the doctors behind that, go for it.

Child: Can I have your gall bladder afterward?

Me: ...I honestly should have seen that coming.

Child: Is that a yes?

...I kind of didn't. And yet, in retrospect, I am surprised that wasn't the first question. The normal response should be what on earth would you do with a gallbladder? but the thing is? He probably has a list somewhere and I don't want to know.

He keeps randomly coming in to poke me in my presumed gall bladder area and then asking me curiously how big the stones are.

How much usable DNA could someone get from a gall bladder anyway? It's not that I think he could build a gene sequencer and cloning chamber out back with some twine and a hairclip, it's more why take that kind of risk?

Poor Horace. You have no idea what you were risking with this stones shit, I have to say.

This comes from insomnia; go about your normal business.

Comments

[synecdochic]

The surgeon did let me keep my gallstones. *g*

[dancing_serpent]

Same for me. They are pretty ugly! *g*

[hivesofactivity]

It is my kidlet's self-bound duty to keep a treasure tin full of baffling and/or disgusting items, so I am entirely unsurprised by this request from yours.

(I read you on lj, but I am going to come off that and come onto reading you here, btw.)

[feanna]

My father kept his gallstones, though they were teeny tiny ones (the biggest about 2mm at most?). (In a urine sample container (of course unused ;) ).)
He also still owns (somewhere) a glass where the matter that was removed from his spinal disc (is that what it's called in English? the stuff between the vertrebra) is floting around in alcohol. It comes with a wooden box made for the glass. I keep wondering what the medical system had money for when my das was in his 20s... (It's pretty grose.)

[elaran]

(it's the intervertebral disc)

[ineptshieldmaid]

I believe we still have my mothers' gall stones somewhere at home. They look like snails...

[elaran]

those questions sound like normal ones to me :P

also i am a med student so i am like yay seeing surgeries! apparently this will change in the next two years when i will be asked to stand there holding retractors for stupidly long amounts of time for numerous surgeries where i cannot see anything cool anyway... but for now i am super excited at the thought and they cannot harsh my squee damnit! i got to scrub in on my grandmother's hip surgery last year which was pretty awesome!!!

How much usable DNA could someone get from a gall bladder anyway? It's not that I think he could build a gene sequencer and cloning chamber out back with some twine and a hairclip, it's more why take that kind of risk?
ahahahahahaha Your Child Is Great/ I await the his World Domination with glee and a little fear.

[sage]

ahahahaha, that is awesome. I asked to keep the end of the bone from my elbow when they cut it out, but the policy had changed a month before and they couldn't let me have it. This was in 1997, so maybe things have changed, or else maybe they differentiate between different sorts of tissue. (This was at Brack, btw, and before the merger with Seton. I have no idea what the current rules are.)

[fyrdrakken]

Might depend on the state. I used to work in a pathology lab (here in Texas) and one of the pathologist assistants had formerly worked in California and told me that not only did the law in that state require patients to be allowed to reclaim their own tissue (after any testing or assessment that may have been done) but certain religions thought it was very important to get back any body parts that had been removed and save them for eventual burial with the person they'd been removed from.

[cereta]

In an old china cabinet at my grandma's, in a tiny glass jar, once sat the gallstones of...someone. A great-grandparent, I think. I have NO IDEA what we did with them when we finally cleaned out the house.

[katekat]

Child is awesome. And so are you for not actually asking what he wants it for... it's better to not know.

[dragojustine]

I love Child more every time you talk about him, really I do.

[forestgreen]

How can you sleep at night knowing he's next door? Do you meticulously comb your hair brushes for strands of hairs? Anything could be use as DNA source.

I'm torn between love for your child and utter fear.

[seekingeden]

Your sprog is so amusing.


Off topic: I have recently watched the Adam Lambert clip 'Whatya want from me' as it is being shown in Germany [no idea if it is different than the one from the US] and I noticed there and in a few recorded live sessions that he has a rather strange skin colour? Or at least it seems awfully yellow to me. Is that normal for him or was it tanning lotion gone horrible wrong? Help Ob Wan Seperis!

[I apologise if my tone implies familiarity, you are just the only person I know who could have an idea about this]

[be-a-rebel.livejournal.com]

Can I just say that Child is awesome? I am simultaneously amused and horrified.

*keeps her fingers crossed for your surgery*

[lurkerlynne.livejournal.com]

Could be that he's starting a collection of gallbladders. Totally innocent.

Then again, he could be sharpening knives and checking anatomy books and soon we will hear of people being lured to cheap hotel rooms and having their gallbladders removed. Like that urban legend with the kidneys.

[seperis.livejournal.com]

...I may never sleep again. Ever.

[burntcopper.livejournal.com]

:cough: their main function is to concentrate chemical fluids. Now think about that...

[jade-dragoness.livejournal.com]

Ooh, I've had this surgery!

If the doctor are doing the least impactful version, I doubt that the gall bladder will be in enough pieces to give to Child. So you luck out there!

The doctors won't leave enough large pieces sounds like the perfect excuse to give to him. =D

[celestialcuming.livejournal.com]

Your boy is so awesome! LOL! I remember when I was younger I desperately wanted to keep all the bits of me that were surgically removed. I wanted my tonsils and my wisdom teeth and the puss they scraped out of my sinuses. My mom was far less cool than you and always said no *sigh*

[reddwarfer.livejournal.com]

Your kid reminds me of my kid. You have my congratulations and commiserations.

[akacat]

Lol. I suggest that you encourage the Drs to let him watch. It's not likely to happen, but if it does it increases the chances that he'll become a surgeon and support you in style in your old age.

Or he'll become a surgeon who experiments on things and semi-accidentally push us all to another level of evolution.

It's probably a win either way.

[seperis.livejournal.com]

He's really into reptile-human hybrids. I mean, the least frightening option right now is he goes the furry (scaley?) route and ends up cosplaying a dinosaur and dating foxgirls.

[sidara.livejournal.com]

i honestly love the posts about you and your son. they're just so hysterical. obviously you are raising this kid correctly for the time when he will attempt to take over the world.

[justblue0162.livejournal.com]

we have my dad's gall stones in a little jar somewhere. but he had his surgery years ago, before they did everything laproscopically or with super high-tech ultrasound or whatever they use now, so that might not be an option any more :( on the plus side, you won't end up with a 6 inch scar like he has.

good luck! ♥

[doublehelix20.livejournal.com]

As a biologist, let me reassure you that there is more than enough DNA in a gallbladder. To do...any number of things.

...but he'll still need some donor human oocytes for the cloning project to work out.

[seperis.livejournal.com]

How "voluntary' do the human oocyte donors need to be? Like, totally hypothetical, if the questionaire said something like "donating body stuff for cool project!!1111! then basically I'm asking, what country does not extradite to the US if there was a hypothetical discovery and then hypothetical fleeing in the night?

This is going to be on America's Most Wanted and no one will even be like, surprised during the (online) interviews.

[hollyxu.livejournal.com]

I should keep an eye on the news from your area of the States, is what you're saying?

He'd fit into my family...

[rattlecatcher.livejournal.com]

My father, in the middle of surgery to change out his pacemaker, asked if he could have the old one. They were a little shocked by the question - apparently no one had asked that before. He now has a collection of them, three or four. One is about the size of a Zippo, so I told him he ought to have it made into a lighter. I promised him I'd use it everyday, if he did. He is still considering this, very intrigued.

PS - I'm thinking good thoughts for the surgery and your recuperation.

Re: He'd fit into my family...

[yellowvalley.livejournal.com]

.... I still have my pacemaker. It's in my sock drawer. :D

[linden-jay.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. I would be frightened if I were you.

But yes, like someone said, if they do the surgery laproscopically, it won't really be in a condition for him to use it as a whole, or to be able to look at it and go 'this is what a gallbladder looks like outside the human body'. I had mine out in October, but I won't go into detail unless you'd like me to. Especially because I was one of the very, VERY rare people who ended up having the surgery be the more invasive one, which is a very different process.

[dont_panic4242.livejournal.com]

Even when the surgery is done laparoscopically, the gallbladder (with stones inside) is usually removed fully intact. But most hospitals have a policy that stuff removed during surgery has to get sent to pathology to be cut up and examined under a microscope, so I think Child is still out of luck. :)

[svrldsmntls.livejournal.com]

OHH JEEBUS gallstones are freaking hell i just had my entire gallbladder taken out just a month ago. im doing great now but i wish i could say the same about my bowel movements x____x lets just say what used to take a few mins feels like a few hours now DX trust me you'll see what i mean when they do the surgery if you have any questions just ask me k :D