seperis | how is this my life again?

I just realized my moral compass is actually kind of fucked up when applied to shoes.

I'd have sex with unpleasant people for these boots.

If I was wearing them during sex, I might not actually notice anyone else's existence, so you see how this works out.

This can't end well. I need my obsession with computers to return now, please. I just don't think that discovering my one true shoe should involve Christian Louboutin you know?

This has been a message from my lack of willpower. And luckily, from all the credit cards I cut recently. No, I didn't go looking for them desperately, so please don't ask. Or stare resentfully at the garbage cans or anything.

BTW work hates me, so if I am quiet, it's mostly because I'm trying to drown myself in the sink at work. What I am saying here is, would mental health be a reason to buy these? If you know, it saved me from a terrible sink accident?

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Oh my gosh, those are so--

a;ldkfaj;sldfaj;fj

They are like sex in shoe form.

Yes, thank you! THIS. It's like, yes.

*hands* They are The Boots.

(no subject)

From:

everysecondtuesday - Date: 2010-05-19 06:12 am (UTC) - expand

You're not going to like this, but I think homicide is justifiable in order to obtain those. I mean, jfc, WANT.

...I will not say that didn't occur to me.

*tries not to crawl into monitor*

WANT. holy shit, those are Boots.

Yes. Yes, they are.

I haven't been staring at them lustfully or anything for hours.

oh my god those BOOTS. *stares lustfully*

*nods and continues to stare*

Luckily, I am saved from boot-lust by my more practical urges. (Which are: "holy fuck, is that how much they cost?" and "if I tried to take a step in those I would fall flat on my face and break my nose. And possibly both ankles, too.")

having said that, those boots really are the sex and leather ideal.

This. They are like "THIS IS THE ULTIMATE EXPRESSION OF LEATHER AND SEX HERE". And this really works for me.

there is nothing wrong with your moral compass.

Boots are a higher moral plane, really.

*flails* Oh honey. They are ASTOUNDING.

... I have an ambition. I will have a wardrobe that, apart from sweats and jeans for relaxing in, will be CUSTOM MADE FOR ME. I've had to be very stern with myself about "I WILL HAVE SAVINGS BEFORE I BUY ANY OF THIS OMG".

And then I discovered that there are people who custom make shoes. Including a truly fabulous pair of boots (the second pair down)

THE WORLD IS TRYING TO PART ME FROM MY MONEY.

I KNOW THE FEELING.

Those are beautiful, beautiful boots. I'm a sucker for unexpected hits of colour on the sole of footwear. Especially that red. Yum.

*sighs over them dreamily*

Holy shit. I want them. And... duh duh duuuuuuuh! I'm not really a shoe person at all.

I can see how it's hard to resist. I mean, look at them! Perfection shaped into leather!

See, I have the soul of a philistine, because I look at those and go, "Hmm, look an awful lot like some Newport News was offering a while back, in the choice of black or red patent leather, for a hell of a lot cheaper..." (Yeah, actually, they still have a few in clearance, sizes 5 through 6.5, red only.) And the reason why I never bought a pair of the tall patent leather ones myself is that I can't stand actually wearing heels...

HOW much!

*choke*

That link just gets me to an international shipping page...???

If I ever decide to end it all, I will buy those boots. Seriously, with my bad leg if I tried to walk in heels like that I'd fall and break my neck.

I think the saddest thing is that those boots are worth far more that my pathetic excuse for a car (I paid $300 for this care and vastly over paid).

Who wouldn't have sex for those boots? I mean, really. That's not a fucked up moral compass, that's just good sense, man.

...OK, they're pretty. But the question you must always ask yourself at these times is, do you actually have anywhere you can wear them to?

I would create events for them. I'd wander around wearing them with pajamas. I will buy skirts just to show them off.

....okay, probably there would not be many events that would qualify, no.

eta: the spelling of 'wear' was driving me crazy

edited at: Date: 2010-05-19 04:50 am (UTC)

(no subject)

From:

risha - Date: 2010-05-19 04:54 am (UTC) - expand

(no subject)

From:

ladyvyola.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-05-19 01:14 pm (UTC) - expand

Bootses! Whee!

Unfortunately, due to a rather sever limp, I can't wear heels like that. :( But if I could? Those would be mine.

It's increasingly difficult not to paw at the screen helplessly.

(no subject)

From:

lurkerlynne.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-05-19 04:50 am (UTC) - expand

i have the perfect pj's to wear with them! and seriously, i don't want to be reading about your untimely loss in a fatal sink accident....

That is a good point. No one wants to read about death-by-sink!

*mulls*

a) how unpleasant? unappealing physically? off-putting personality? moral corruption? megalomaniacal tendencies?

b) those shoes are terrifyingly beautiful.

c) What I am saying here is, would mental health be a reason to buy these? If you know, it saved me from a terrible sink accident?

-price of shoes (s) = hours of therapy* (t)

-hours of therapy needed to keep you from drowning yourself in the sink (d)

Assuming shoes prevent drowning:
If (d) > (t) then (d) > (s) therefore (s) is the reasonable option. Clearly.

*about 17 hours in Seattle, closer to 24 hours in Austin.

That is the most awesome math ever.

...not that I worked that equation several times or anything.

(no subject)

From:

boggit.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-05-19 03:23 pm (UTC) - expand

Those boots ARE sex.

Yes. Yes, they are. *tries not to grab them*

This can't end well. I need my obsession with computers to return now, please.

This is why I so like being a computer nerd who likes collecting spare parts. I spend hardly anything on shoes, but video cards? Homg, EVERY LAST DIME I HAVE. \o/

Also, please don't drown yourself in the sink. *hug hug*

I know! I like that part! This boots thing is getting to me. I'm not even googling for the Android gemini this week!

1. Those boots are awesome
2a. I was about to say that I've had sex with unpleasant people for less, decided it didn't quite sound right, and have settled for...
2b. If those boots (okay, I want guys boots of equivalent hawt) were a post-coital present, I would not regret the worst sex I've ever had. I would probably repeat it, just in case.
3. If retail therapy reduces suicidal tendencies, I'm all for it. Just remember that unpayable levels of credit card debt can increase suicidal tendencies.

2b. If those boots (okay, I want guys boots of equivalent hawt) were a post-coital present, I would not regret the worst sex I've ever had. I would probably repeat it, just in case.

That is a truly great philosophy, right there.

Those boots are awesome. Fortunately for my peace of mind, I can't walk in heels that spiky and thus don't have to suffer from OMG, WANT NOW!!! quite as badly.

*sniffles* They are truly an artistic vision.

Oh, those are lovely.

Those shoes. OMG. I don't have words.

*NODNODNOD* THIS.

Oh, if you have to discove your one true shoe, I think it really should involve Christian Louboutin. I mean, would those boots be right without the bright red soles? I don't think so.

That is very true.

*tries not to will shoes to appear on desk*

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