this is sort of a rant but it's under cut, because rant

I want to one day create a Class Jar, in which every day that I don't see at least one completely idiotic and almost painfully wrong argument regarding benefits programs, SSI, disability, or ACA I put in 25 cents. In ten years, I will have enough for a taco at taco bell (plus tax). It makes me want to create a requirement that to graduate from college, you must do the following:

1.) work in food service (6 months)
2.) work mid- and low-end retail (6 months) and/or mid- or low-end grocery store
3.) clerk in a public service/welfare office (6 months)

If you run for congress, you are required by law to do all of those things in double time and as your only job. Because people have wildly--and I do mean wildly--hilarious ideas of how they'd do at minimum wage in theory, and even funnier memories of how they used to do it when they did.



Like, right now, I look back and remember fondly working for six hundred dollars a month that I'd use for rent, electricity, food, and clubbing, and think about how right now, my credit card bill is more than that monthly (I pay off monthly, free Best Buy points!) but case in fact; I couldn't live on that now and I don't pretend I was so special then that I could do it, and I bet most people who wax lyrically on those low-income days don't remember what all it took to pull that shit off. Even adjusting for inflation--Jesus, I have an excel formula for that--I couldn't do it, because of some very interesting key factors separate from my regular prescriptions I have to now fill monthly.

1.) My parents paid my health insurance. I was never, ever, ever in danger from the common cold.
2.) My mom came to visit me and I lacked even rudimentary pride; she bought me food.
3.) I went home to do laundry. I think I used the once in the complex twice? It was frightening.
4.) I ate at work like a lot.
5.) I shared a two bedroom not wonderful apartment with two other people and electric and phone were super low because of that.
6.) My parents gave me money regularly as long as I was working. Not a lot--I mean working class level not a lot, not middle class not a lot, this is low double digit figures here--but it was my entertainment budget.
7.) I made no egregious mistakes, which is related to point 8 below....
8.) Luck. Jesus, so much luck. Unbelievable luck.

Luck is a really underestimated part of life, and at $600 a month, I got unbelievably lucky. I didn't need a lot of things to go wrong; I didn't even need three things to go wrong; I needed one, repeat, one to kill my budget dead. I didn't, and so I went on fairly happily.

Right now, I'm around the average mean for Austin, and I had one thing--one stupid thing--go wrong that threw my budget off for almost a year fixing, and right this minute, the summer's electric bills went quite literally insane due to reasons, and Jesus, if I had zero support, that would kill my budget for two years minimum. I'd be paying off insanely high-interest payday loans, which no, been there done that and no.

Luck is, actually, random. Being virtuous sometimes is a drawback to getting it, gotta tell you; being thrifty, also doesn't get it very often; doing everything right does not raise your chances with luck, if anything, it's lower.

To wit: I'm IT professional who tests programs for a living, and I got that job with only five years of tenure because in 1999, I found the internet and liked fanfic and needed to make a webpage. The gods of hilarious unexpected consequences just called today when I went to an interview with the deputy director of health services--for a job that would jump me an income bracket. I made the interview screening for that, and I can tell you right now in an sane world, that doesn't happen to people who didn't finish college and seriously debated once whether to use 'dick' or 'cock' in a porn scene on their textual aesthetics. Cock, by the way, dick throws me out, no idea why, but the point stands.

1999. The internet. My first computer, my annoying ex-boyfriend, fanfic, and shitty geocities: thus is born someone testing ACA compatibility and changes in state programs for benefits and to the universe's laughter, is good at it. I wouldn't have known I liked IT or programming if in 1999, I hadn't read my first Tom/B'Elanna fic and thought "Hey, I want to write one." That's not just luck, granted; that's the unintended consequences of luck being chaotic neutral.

Growing up low- to mid-working class does not, in fact, give me a better work ethic, appreciate what I have more, or give me esoteric virtues now. At best, it makes me somewhat more conscious of my budgeting, but it didn't make me thrifty; a childhood on a very close budget meant we had all the necessities (mostly, with variation) but very, very few luxuries, and dude, I overkill the fuck out of things because like in childhood, when bad luck could kill our family budget for not months but years, now was what we were sure of, later could be a repossession, a layoff, and no, saving the few pennies now would do fuck-all when big shit hit. I had to make a hobby to create a working savings account with stocks trading. I got lucky doing it, don't wrong here, but making it hard to get to my money helped, and so did dropping stock prices because selling below what I bought, yes, that bothered me.

I don't like bootstraps arguments for that reason, because they predispose the concept of luck is either non-existent or a natural consequence of doing the right things at the right time and therefore luck comes from bootstraps. It doesn't, and virtue doesn't get you anywhere. Hard work, granted, helps a lot, but there's also a separate factor. When people say "I didn't just get lucky, I worked hard" it's almost true, but not quite; they think of luck as jackpots and magic, and it's not; it's also you don't have that one shitty bad thing happen, or three of them happen, because luck can be good or chaotic neutral or bad or all three at once, but carrying on like luck is magic goodness misses the point.

Luck: you didn't make a single mistake, unwitting, stupid, unavoidable, whatever, that couldn't be fixed with what you had at that moment. That's unbelievable luck; that my friend, is fucking magic. I know it's magic, I know this personally, viscerally, painfully, because most of mine would have fucked me if I didn't have magic of my own; a family that loved me, that would do it's damndest to get me out of it, including sacrifice they couldn't afford at the time. I know this is magic, I know it, because when I was a caseworker, I saw me in a hundreds of people, maybe a thousand walked through my office, and the only difference, the only real difference here, was that most of them didn't have the safety net of a family just scraping mid-working class that could--just barely, Jesus, thinking about it now I don't know how they did it--catch me.

Luck is not having a shitty boss who can screw you over so much if they don't like you because reasons that have nothing to do or everything to do with you, either one; luck is not having a sudden need for hospitalization or even moaning in bed for days and get fired/docked the amount of rent; not ever getting sick is also luck, sunshine, your immune system is not better because you work hard, its biology which doesn't really care all that much; the lack of negative luck is, in fact, magic luck, amazing luck, and how people miss this blows my mind.

You do, in fact, make your own luck; that much is true. But all you do is create the constraints in which they operate, not the type you'll get: good, neutral, bad. How much you get of each of those is--surprise!--luck. If you can't look back on your life and see exactly what I mean when I say that--if you can't see every time something could have fucked you and nothing at the time could have fixed it if it happened--you're making one of the more depressing arguments I've heard for predestination ever and I'm including the horror of Calvinism in there. If you're honest, if you see it, you also now know this; someone, somewhere, had the same thing happen to them, and they actually didn't have what was needed to fix it.

This has been brought to you by way too much news and too many people with a distinct lack of self-awareness and someone on a site who was protesting how much in taxes they paid on a tiny 100,000 income. All I could think was how exciting it would be to log in to pay taxes on a six digit income, because a six digit income, Jesus Christ. I still get vaguely excited when I realize I have a retirement account--an actual retirement account--that I can afford to regularly contribute to. It's exciting; it's a reminder that I make enough to have the luxury to plan a little for the future.

Comments

[out_there]

Luck is not having a shitty boss who can screw you over so much if they don't like you because reasons that have nothing to do or everything to do with you, either one; luck is not having a sudden need for hospitalization or even moaning in bed for days and get fired/docked the amount of rent; not ever getting sick is also luck, sunshine, your immune system is not better because you work hard, its biology which doesn't really care all that much; the lack of negative luck is, in fact, magic luck, amazing luck, and how people miss this blows my mind.

I'm remembering being 20 y.o., working full-time office work for under $11/hr and being stupid enough to go clubbing with the month's rent -- in cash -- sitting in my handbag. Luck is that when my handbag was stolen, I found it in the ladies' bathroom with $30 taken from my purse but the month's rent still safely tucked away in an envelope. I didn't have the savings to back that up and it would have taken months to get on top of that debt if I'd lost it. Sometimes, luck is the difference between surviving on a low income and drowning in debt for years.

This has been brought to you by way too much news and too many people with a distinct lack of self-awareness and someone on a site who was protesting how much in taxes they paid on a tiny 100,000 income.

OMG, I'm with you there. Every election, every god damned time, there are stories of how election promises will impact "everyday people". Every time, there's a couple earning $150K - $180K complaining about how the loss of benefits/subsidised childcare/whatever will make such an impact on their lifestyle and might, y'know, stop the wife from working because it won't be financially viable. It makes me grind my teeth and want to growl at people.

(I mean, Mum and I? Are on a combined income of $75K and compared to what we have lived on before, I feel ridiculously wealthy. I mean, up until a few years ago, I was used to rent/mortgage being 50% of income, and the rest was bills, food, transport and feel incredibly lucky to save up to go out to the city for a big day a couple times a year.)

I have no sympathy for people who complain about being on double that.

[ilyena_sylph]

Right now, you are my favorite person this entire week.

And yes, I want that requirement for college graduation, too.

[pudacat]

This, so much this. (Side note, cock, not dick. I hate the word "dick". I only use it when referencing certain men named Richard)

My parents brought me groceries when they visited. They both were bootstrap people, and I had to much pride to tell anyone how lost I was, so when they finally discovered (years after the fact) how hard up I had been at times, they were mortified. They'd have stepped in, but since I believed what I went through was my fault, so never asked for help.

That said, I'm totally begging from help from Dad right now. Uterine biopsies don't pay for themselves, especially with a high deductible insurance plan.

[pudacat]

GAH! This totally posted before I was ready; However, here it is. tl;dr- I love you and your ability to say what I can't in 30 words or less.

You're awesome.

[msilverstar]

I agree with you. It's really hard to admit that I was in the right place at the right time, but I try to remember that it was dumb fucking luck and not virtue. I worked my ass off sometimes, but I sat on my ass and read a lot of fanfic, and I got lucky.

I like the concept of "windfall" -- I didn't plant the trees but the apples fell in my lap.

[lilacsigil]

My country has a lot of problems - unemployment benefits and many single parent payments being shoved way below the poverty line in particular - but at least we don't have to worry that a minor illness will crush us forever. I had a major illness - cancer - and while my financial survival mostly happened because my benefits could pay my rent and transport and the rest of the time I spent in bed using no electricity and little food, I didn't wreck my credit for life, nor my family's.

[azurelunatic]

Word. :(

[taliahale]

First off, bless this whole post.

Just an endless stream of YES. I spent the first 18 years of my life very lucky; I was raised upper-middle class by parents who were both of very working class backgrounds. I'm now completely independent financially (though not voluntarily, if they'd pay my school bills I'd let them) and learned budgeting and how to work multiple, minimum-wage jobs while going to school.

Second off, this bit here:
1.) work in food service (6 months)
2.) work mid- and low-end retail (6 months) and/or mid- or low-end grocery store
3.) clerk in a public service/welfare office (6 months)
My dad was the first person in his family to go to college. He is very much Mr. Boot Straps. The thing is, he's literally MENSA-level brilliant. A modicum of work ethic is going to equal success, and he got full rides to both college and medical school. He's never worked as anything aside from a well-respected, highly-educated professional. I've talked at him enough that he's no longer as shitty to people in service positions, but I would kill for him to work my job for a day. (I work night audit/front desk at a hotel in a snooty neighborhood.)

[niqaeli]

Oh my god, I have nothing but sympathy for you. Night audit is its own special hell to start with -- add rich entitled people into it and I'd want to throw myself off a bridge.

[taliahale]

Just saw this reply--yeah, night audit is a whole new kind of dealing with entitled assholes. I will take your sympathy and add that if you've worked night audit for any length of time, you're a hero of mine. I don't know how people do this for any significant period.

[niqaeli]

I did it for a year at a limited services business traveler hotel right by a small but growing airport. It was as quiet as night audit gets, really. It was still a hell of its own. I have a friend who worked it five years up in a sketchy Days Inn near a bunch of night clubs, her stories trump mine hands down.

The sports groups (teams of minors, in town for tournaments) were pretty bad. The weddings were the worst. Hands down. I can still shut a drunk down and get them out of my presence like nobody's business because, somehow, drunks aren't funny to talk to and see what they do when you're literally the only employee on property and your back-up if things go wrong is, you call 911.

I am well shot of it and I refuse to ever work graveyard again, barring extreme circumstances. The hours suck inherently, nobody respects your sleep schedule, and you have to deal with all the weirdoes. (And it actually made my sleep disorder worse, which I hadn't known was POSSIBLE.) >_>

[busaikko]

If you run for congress, you are required by law to do all of those things in double time and as your only job.

And they should also, even while in Congress, have to use public transportation to go everywhere. To the supermarket! To work! *rubs hands together*

the lack of negative luck is, in fact, magic luck, amazing luck, and how people miss this blows my mind.

Yes, yes, this, so so much.

[genarti]

I think I love you for this entire post.

[blueraccoon]

Can I add "call center work" to your list of requirements? Because I avoided working retail and I avoided working in food service, but man, I did my time in call centers making very little money. My husband and I survived for a few years while I was doing call center work and he was finishing school in large part because his parents gave us money every month. We lived in a crappy one-bedroom apartment between a church and a school (Saturday and Sunday mornings were brutal) and had no money for pretty much anything, and yeah, it was not a fun time.

I also had an insane amount of luck in falling into my current career--I was doing tech support for cable internet and TV customers, and long story short I got an offer of a new position as a tier-1 analyst in a network ops center, which was like not much I'd done before but they took a chance on me when the first peson they hired didn't work out. I worked out really well and again long story short I currently have a job I love and which pays me well enough my husband and I own a house which is something we never thought we'd accomplish a couple years ago. (I was out of work for two years after my ex-boss aka Satan fired me, but i'm in such a better place now.)

[majoline]

Oh ho ho, the stories I could tell you about hitting every single fucking branch on the shitty luck tree all the way down. And the problem with everyone you know being well off, is getting "Bootstraps!" and "You must have deserved it!" yelled at you anytime you try to go for help. *sigh*

[indiw]

Yes, *this*. My parents worked in the service industry - after that, they do their best to tip generously and beat it into their kids' heads to do the same. They hauled themselves up into the upper middle class with luck (good and bad throughout) and work. They (and I) are of the belief that the higher the income level, the higher the percentage of tax that should be paid - because, at that point, though one might piss and moan about how much you pay, it won't be the difference between being able to pay the bills or not. /drops off small soap box. Thank you for posting this.