seperis | there really are invisible computer people

Dear Invisible People Inside My Computer,

So like, on Friday, my son calls me at work and says, there's this box that says it goes in the refrigerator; do you want me to put it in there? The answer was yes, and to be fair, I thought he was talking about the box talking to him, so I didn't want to invalidate his talking box.

(if you say any of that paragraph surprised you, please refer to tag 'child')

As it turns out, there was a box. A box that didn't talk, as it turns out, and okay, yes, I should have maybe assumed that in the first place, but it was Friday and that is not the weirdest call from Child I ever got; it was more restful than 'I'm sorry about the hole, bye!" I mean, talking box is like, awesome. A friend at home!

I have no idea how to get this across in text to convey the sheer glee, but it had all the sugar-based food that I couldn't eat before surgery and so never actually talked about because the coffee thing was bad enough, but the list of questionable foods I was off by August was really--irritating--and I'd cut off some things proactively. Also there is a bear, which yes, there was a bear!. Obviously I wanted to know who sent it, so we went looking for the external box and apparently, it no longer existed, but Child said "It was the invisible computer people" and I thought, oh, funny, someone sent me candy and I'm going to have to actually say here "Did anyone send me chocolate?" or worse, maybe not mine.

There was also a Christmas bear--a Christmas Bear--so really, that did seem to suggest this all was mine, or I would claim it until the day I died.

Then on Tuesday, I come home to another box. One that also said refrigeration, and there were pears! And I was like, whose pears? I want pears! And I took one, and then realized they were my pears and hell yes, I don't have to share them! And strangely, it indeed was from "The Invisible People Inside My Computer" (Sorry I doubted you, Child, but come on, talking box) and while taking that box to the garage for future storage purposes, well, there was the first box, right there and there was card and yes, thank you, it was the perfect post-Horace glut of goodness.

I have not actually glutted myself, and eventually, I will share with Child. That was--I mean, unexpected understates the case. Talking box seemed more likely.

Thank you so much, and I apologize for the delay; this actual entry has been open since yesterday and then there was that entire--thing--and I was eating a pear late last night while frowning at that--thing--and oh, irony.

Thank you very, very much.

--seperis

(Note: Trufax "invisible people inside my computer" is on the card. This is not a psychotic break. God, there was a card. This is so awesome.)

Further Note for Invisible People: okay, on the exterior paper that the card was under was your name, but I wasn't sure if you meant for that to be there or you were going for anonymous, but then it occurred to me what if it was supposed to be there and you think I can't read while I was finishing this entry. You're extremely awesome. Thank you.

this is so very adorable. I am glad the Invisible People sent you happiness inside a talking box!

also, oh my god, all of your Child posts are amazing; between you and

thefourthvine, I am assembling a rough draft of Being Awesome: A Guide to Geek Motherhood. I hope to need it one day.

I've officially added a codicil to my Child Is Insane But Sometimes Right about insisting on details when involving inanimate objects. Just in case.

ahahaha. a very important codicil, it seems! I will note this in the "Points of Clarification" appendix in the Being Awesome manual; it seems that half the trick is knowing when and how to ask a child for clarification and on what points.

Yay, invisible people inside the computer! &hearts!

THAT WAS SO COOL. *glee*

Note: Trufax "invisible people inside my computer" is on the card. This is not a psychotic break. God, there was a card. This is so awesome.

That is the most awesome thing I've heard today. *cherishes the idea*

I felt validated by the internetz, won't lie.

:)

There is a virtual card, too. :)

Up until the entire 'where's the box' thing of yore on Friday, I was getting teary-eyed (while eating chocolate covered pretzels, btw). Because omg food I could eat!

(Then I was snacking while rying to figure out how to like, subtly find out who sent it without admitting the external box had gone awry because I thought child was hallucinating.)

(Oh, the timing was perfect; I was still off anything sugar-heavy for the first week and I hadn't had time to throw myself bodily at the candy aisle, so it was like HOW DID TEH UNIVERSE KNOW.)

Thank you!

:)

The teddy bear was at

grammarwoman's suggestion! And

northern pointed out that it might take a few weeks for you to be able to have the chocolate type stuff, hence the pears and the candy. *G* (I was back to eating all the stuff I'd missed within a few days, and I remember being the same way -- OH MY GOD, STUFF.)

You are welcome. I'm thrilled that you are feeling better, really, especially after so long!

It was hilarious--two days after surgery, I was rebelliosu adn went to read the instructions my doctor gave and then found out exactly which room in the house I would regret if I didn't minimize fat and heavy sugar. Eveyr cup of coffee I was torn between paranoia (one small spoon! does honey count? You really going to put honey in coffee? Answer: did not) and I DO NOT CARE (I think in capslock). I read those instructions a lot.

For a second, I was like "the gods of surgery are rewarding me?" because my God.

*SO MANY HUGS*

They did my checkup today and it took a really anticlimactic five seconds. Stare, poke my belly button area, looked positive and engaged. And then really happily, "Oh, yoru gallbladder came back from pathology and it was just full in stones and inflamed!" I feel like I made her life better today with that. It was a very strange feeling.

*MORE HUGS*

Ha, that's awesome! They actually gave me my gallstone (this was back when they could) -- it was larger than a golf ball. In fact, it was around the size of a baseball. I kept staring at it and thinking, holy crap!

(ps: we got a box of the pears for ourselves, too. those things are CRACK. once they get to the perfect-ripe stage, the best way to eat them is to cut them in half, use a spoon to scoop out the seeds, and then eat them with the spoon like a cantelope.)

Wait, so she was happy that your gall bladder was full of stones and inflamed?

*hands* It was really the happiest and least intrusive yet unsettling exam regarding my gall bladder since diagnosis. I want to go with "she was happy it was out because from the condition, I was going to get a lot worse" but I mean, maybe she just really loves pathology reports?

I've never made someone so happy before without having to contribute something less personal than an internal organ.

I'm guessing she was happy because she took that nasty inflamed thing OUT of your body, and now you're BETTER, and that's kind of awesome. It's very satisfying when you get to actually fix things like that for people. :)

I'm going with this one. *bounces*

Now I'm wondering how many times I've seemed mysteriously and inappropriately happy about my patients' issues and left them thinking "...wtf?". LOL probably more often then I'd hope. I do occasionally go "Oh my god, something actually worked, hallelujah!" when people tell me a medication I gave them helped, which usually gets a smile. It's possible they're all just humouring me though...

Keep in mind this was like, the shortest exam ever and she wasn't my original surgeon but the PA. I'm not kididng about the look, poke, done thing. I was still in '...that's it?' and then WHEE STONES!

Oh my God I have made you self-conscious of medical success. DO NOT FOLLOW THAT. This is the anesthesia speaking! Google says it's possible for delayed anesthesia something-bad-but-temporary.

*frantic*

Hehe, post-op visits can be weirdly anticlimactic for everyone involved. It's like "Soooo... you had surgery huh? How's that working out for you? Good? Good. *drums fingers* Let's see your incision then... yep, healing, not infected... so... have a nice life?"

Oh not to worry, I'll continue being happy about medical successes whenever I can get them. Those things are hard to come by, at least when you're not in the business of solving everyone's problems with a scalpel. Surgeons are so lucky. ;)

That is such an awesome story.

My Child has put up with me enraptured over Internet People boxes (mine had The Best Rainboots Ever) - and my recent discovery that I'm no longer allergic to coconut. Yesterday's exciting realization: Fancy homemade soap! I can have some!

Oh God, I can't imagine allergies to coconut. It's almost as bad as peanut in the restrictions for eating (I did not know this myself until someone pointed out that coconut and coconut oil are really common). Congratulations!

Where do you get the soap or do you make it yourself?

I'm so glad your feeling better! And I kinda maybe want to be best friends with your child.

I sometimes kind of wonder what it's like to be his peer. I just can't imagine it's not kind of like an acid trip; I mean, once his friends start experimenting, they'll be like whatever, let's go see Child, we can get this for free by standing in his presence and start him talking. Still might end up in a dumpster in a foreign city with no money and no clear idea why your legs are now robotic, but at least you'll be sober.

DW needs a "like" button for comments like this. :)

::ponders::

I should commission him to build me a Borg costume for Halloween next year. All my friends will be SO JEALOUS.

\O/ Yays! I'm glad you got it and liked it. I hope your insides are much nicer to you from now on. *grin*

\o/

Yesterday, I was wearing little socks sent to me by the invisible people in my computer during my long hospital stay - I think the first one? They are baby-pink and have little happy pigs on them. In short: they make my life brighter, still.

God, I wish I'd thought (or had been able to) send you the box just to get this story out of you!

*dies* It was so embarrassing. I spent all weekend snacking trying to figure out how to post a thank you and explain, no, it's not my fault, I THOUGHT HE MEANT THE BOX TALKED SO I DIDN'T GET DETAILS and then pears! And then there was the box with the packing slip, so I felt vindicated for surreptitious pre-thanks snacking. Sort of?

It's jsut all so obvious in retrospect; he also gets a share for being right. Darn it.

....poor Child, no wonder he is warped!

Talking box thing makes sense in context. I dont know what kind.

I really want to know about this, now.

Ooooh no, a sentence like that, I never ask for clarification if I can help it. I mean, he called so he's breathing, and no sirens. Probably no smoke; he sounded okay.

Speculative, backyard to the left of the house, there was at one time a fresh pile of disturbed dirt. I actually thought about going to see what it was, and then I remembered, no. Later, again never asked the pile of dirt may or may not have been a hole that may or may not have had a lawnmower stuck in it, because Child is many things but not one to check for gas. And who sane would leave gas in the lawnmover when Child has access to it.

I don't know how these things relate, and honestly, as long as I can safely say the pet population here is not going down mysteriously, nor is Child wiki'ing for anatomy and Charles Manson articles, I'm okay with just never thinking hard on the subject. That way lies like, madness. Or prescription drug abuse.

I love teaching children like this. He sounds amazing. I remember my parents saying once that they were glad I was smart and weird and not a jock because they wouldn't have known how to raise a 'normal' child!

The invisible computer people do love you, you know.

Considering that work is gone to mandatory overtime, mandatory Saturdays, and we lost Veteran's Day and might have ot volunteer to come in the day after Thanksgiving, I can safely state the invisible people pretty much wiped my frustration totally. Being able to sit at my desk with it at work and smugly snack while we had another code update and everything failed? Delays became snack time and that was good. WHATVER TIME TO TRY A CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW THING.

Invisible people are psychic or something.

It's wonderful to have imaginary friends inside the computer who actually send actual care packages - congratulations!

Delicious ones! I am going to seriously go into sugar shock soon.

Cute! I love your child stories. Almost kinda makes me want one. ;-)

Just FYI: In both Chrome and Firefox when I click on one of your links, like for Merlin (happens for most of them), I get page not found errors. I played with the link a little and it seems to be b/c: I get a link like ...../tag/recs:+merlin (or http://seperis.livejournal.com/tag/recs:+stargate:atlantis+2005). The link works when I take the + out: ......./tag/recs: merlin (http://seperis.livejournal.com/tag/recs:%20stargate:atlantis%202005, where the %20 = a space. Just thought I'd let you know.

God, I forgot LJ did the tag code change thing. Thank you!

Usually when my box talks to me, I have to go to the pharmacist.

Are you going to post a picture of the new bear?

Never mind. Saw it on the website. I like the feet.
The cherry/chocolate candy cane sounds awesome.

Yeah, I pretty much knew where this story was going with the second sentence, because one of my own Xmas traditions is the Swiss Colony order, and they stick big "refrigerate immediately" signs all over the packaging.

But -- so very, very glad some people were on the ball and thought to send you a care package! Two, even!

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