seperis | *grumbles* (Reply)

Also, while I'm feeling invulnerable and rather grumpy.

Thing I Really Wish People Would Stop Doing

For the love of God, random capitalization without rhyme or reason must stop. It's the reading equivalent of nails on the chalkboard. I'm not pointing to a specific fandom here or anything (smallville) or pairing (Lex/Lana), but hey, if this applies to you? Seriously, quit that. Lex is naked. I'm kinda your bitch until you start doing that.

Any time you are adding on extra body parts, explain what the hell they are doing there. My tentacle mpreg strategy didn't just appear by magic, people. There was porn, and then suddenly, there were tentacles, and if you want to make me cry, you'll tell me how I should be more open minded, because I'm open minded, but seriously. Tentacles. Just there. For no discernible reason. So didn't see that coming. I understand the joy of shocking your readers. But making them cry and foreswear all porn in the foreseeable future? Not so much with the good.

In author notes, do not ever tell me you have done anything you have written about, in detail. I really don't like you that much. I mean, I like some of you a lot, and all of you in different ways, but only a few of you are the ones I am going to be comfortable, or stupid enough with, to say, please, tell me more of your six person and whipped cream orgy that's just like that WiP you are working on. Yeah, so. I'm reading your porn. I do not need your sexual history too. Unless I'm very drunk. Then I won't remember. So see, just ask me if I'm drunk before you do that.

I'm serious about that wonton thing. Stop that. That's really really getting on my nerves. And also, making me go from ooh, pretty, to ooh, Chinese food.

Honey is not good lube, and where the hell did *that* come from? Is there some huge, multifandom challenge of all the things that shouldn't be lube out there and some brave souls are trying to write each one?

I'll think of more later. Anyone want to come play with me? I am lonely, and also, trying to write, and also, really, do you want these posts to continue until I can finally fall sleep? Cause y'all, so far, the forecast says the frantic energy *isn't going away*.

Quotes

If you don't send me feedback, I will sob uncontrollably for hours on end, until finally, in a fit of depression, I slash my wrists and bleed out on the bathroom floor. My death will be on your heads. Murderers
. -- Unknown, on feedback
BTS List
That's why he goes bad, you know -- all the good people hit him on the head or try to shoot him and constantly mistrust him, while there's this vast cohort of minions saying, We wouldn't hurt you, Lex, and we'll give you power and greatness and oh so much sex...
Wow. That was scary. Lex is like Jesus in the desert.
-- pricklyelf, on why Lex goes bad
LJ
Obi-Wan has a sort of desperate, pathetic patience in this movie. You can just see it in his eyes: "My padawan is a psychopath, and no one will believe me; I'm barely keeping him under control and expect to wake up any night now to find him standing over my bed with a knife!"
-- Teague, reviewing "Star Wars: Attack of the Clones"
LJ
Beth: god, why do i have so many beads?
Jenn: Because you are an addict.
Jenn: There are twelve step programs for this.
Beth: i dunno they'd work, might have to go straight for the electroshock.
Jenn: I'm not sure that helps with bead addiction.
Beth: i was thinking more to demagnitize my credit card.
-- hwmitzy and seperis, on bead addiction
AIM, 12/24/2003
I could rape a goat and it will DIE PRETTIER than they write.
-- anonymous, on terrible writing
AIM, 2/17/2004
In medical billing there is a diagnosis code for someone who commits suicide by sea anenemoe.
-- silverkyst, on wtf
AIM, 3/25/2004
Anonymous: sorry. i just wanted to tell you how much i liked you. i'd like to take this to a higher level if you're willing
Eleveninches: By higher level I hope you mean email.
-- eleveninches and anonymous, on things that are disturbing
LJ, 4/2/2004
silverkyst: I need to not be taking molecular genetics.
silverkyst: though, as a sidenote, I did learn how to eviscerate a fruit fly larvae by pulling it's mouth out by it's mouthparts today.
silverkyst: I'm just nowhere near competent in the subject material to be taking it.
Jenn: I'd like to thank you for that image.
-- silverkyst and seperis, on more wtf
AIM, 1/25/2005
You know, if obi-wan had just disciplined the boy *properly* we wouldn't be having these problems. Can't you just see yoda? "Take him in hand, you must. The true Force, you must show him."
-- Issaro, on spanking Anakin in his formative years
LJ, 3/15/2005
Aside from the fact that one person should never go near another with a penis, a bottle of body wash, and a hopeful expression...
-- Summerfling, on shower sex
LJ, 7/22/2005
It's weird, after you get used to the affection you get from a rabbit, it's like any other BDSM relationship. Only without the sex and hot chicks in leather corsets wielding floggers. You'll grow to like it.
-- revelininsanity, on my relationship with my rabbit
LJ, 2/7/2006
Smudged upon the near horizon, lapine shadows in the mist. Like a doomsday vision from Watership Down, the bunny intervention approaches.
-- cpt_untouchable, on my addition of The Fourth Bunny
LJ, 4/13/2006
Rule 3. Chemistry is kind of like bondage. Some people like it, some people like reading about or watching other people doing it, and a large number of people's reaction to actually doing the serious stuff is to recoil in horror.
-- deadlychameleon, on class
LJ, 9/1/2007
If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, then Fan Fiction is John Cusack standing outside your house with a boombox.
-- JRDSkinner, on fanfiction
Twitter
I will unashamedly and unapologetically celebrate the joy and the warmth and the creativity of a community of people sharing something positive and beautiful and connective and if you don’t like it you are most welcome to very fuck off.
-- Michael Sheen, on Good Omens fanfic
Twitter, 6/19/2019
Adding for Mastodon.
-- Jenn, traceback
Fosstodon, 11/6/2022

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