i'm really not amused

Dear Horace the Gall Bladder,

It's fucking four in the morning. Are you kidding me?

So do not have time for this shit.

--seperis

Dear Vicodin,

Did you forget you're a goddamn opiate? Hey, thought; try working already.

--seperis

I know--technically--that one does not try to self-remove one's gall bladder with one's computer repair kit, even if it does come with a very nice scalpel.

I just wanted to sleep. I really don't think that's too much to ask. Shall be counting hours until the pharmacy is open and my doctor gets to work. And somehow, even now, I'm still utterly terrified of surgery.

ETA: Re-reading, to clarify, I am not actually going to attempt self-surgery via tiny scalpel. I mean, I don't even have a decent mirror and have you seen my hand-eye coordination?

Comments

[boggit]

If you have the tiny scalpel, then all you have to do now is find someone with good hand-eye coordination. And possibly a tarp.

I hope you're feeling better (for some value of better) by now.

[everysecondtuesday]

Oh, agh. I hope the vicodin kicks in soon.

[meredyth]

Opiates are fickle, fickle lovers and too often leave you unsatisfied (and with a headache) - at least, that's my sad experience. So sorry that you're feeling wretched, honey. You know, I think there's a lot less pain from surgery than from the symptoms these days (especially as they're doing so much of it key-hole).

That being said, if I can re-build a computer using a nail file and some cutlery, I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to perform surgery using a computer tool kit and a hand-mirror. >.>

*sends wishes of better drugs and a healthy you*

[jamesinboots.livejournal.com]

*hug hug hug*

No self-surgery omg. Just in case: *hide your scalpels*

[http://users.livejournal.com/_aurum/]

*hug <3* I understand the urge, and thankfully nobody showed me a scalpel when my gall blader acted up... *sends sleepy vibes*

[eight-demands.livejournal.com]

Re-reading, to clarify, I am not actually going to attempt self-surgery via tiny scalpel.

I like that you feel you need to clarify this. You know, because otherwise your friends might wonder. That says so much about you. ♥

[seperis.livejournal.com]

Several were around when I was trying to take apart my old TV and was talking about the x-rays box in it excitedly. And my adventures with my VCR. And the time I blew out the fuse box with Christmas lights. I figured clarificatoin would spare them PMing me worriedly or emailing Madelyn for help. *g*

[lehanra.livejournal.com]

Umm. The Vicodin might even make the pain worse. At least for me opiates were a bad bad thing and aggravated my gall bladder. YMMV.

[archaeologist-d.livejournal.com]

sounds like surgery is needed. The gall bladder is such a pain to deal with!

[ellixis.livejournal.com]

I felt so betrayed when the Vicodin didn't even really scratch the gallbladder pain. If it's going to be a controlled substance and all, the least it could do is make the pain stop.

[traveller.livejournal.com]

yeah, adding my experience to the list: painkillers don't really work on gallbladder attacks. pretty much the only thing that worked for me was trying to meditate through the pain. and getting the little bastard yanked out as soon as possible.

[forsweatervests.livejournal.com]

Um. Yep, very glad you're not attempting self-surgery. As we have seen on (even bad) television ((http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sadie_Harris#Storylines)), this very rarely goes well.

[belleweather.livejournal.com]

:( I tried to convince a friend who was in medical school to take mine out with the kitchen knives. He said no, the douche.

[svrldsmntls.livejournal.com]

know your pain!!! god it was fucking hell to wake up with that pain at that hour and wondering why the fuck tonight?! why any night?! dear god vicodin was such a life saver but then that stopped working too and my doctors finally decided it was serious -___-