kneel before your curiously political monologuing sort of sandworm god

[seperis]

...Frank Herbert is never going to get a good adaptation of Dune, is he?

Yes, Dune 2014, once Dune 2010 and Dune 2012, in which the part of Paul Atreides, the Kwizatch Haderach, Muad'-fucking-Dib, he who can fuck your shit up because he really does know exactly how you will die (in detail), Emperor of the Known Universe and whose knife fight with Sting--er, I mean, Feyd-Rautha--that I watched during the fragile cusp of puberty and--well, yeah. Did you ever see that fight? Step off, that was awesome--will sparkle.

Yes. The father of the Giant Sandworm of So Not Subtle Political Philosophy--or God Emperor of Dune, whatever--is Robert Pattinson and I don't think I will survive knowing that.

And okay, call me crazy, I really want an adaptation of God Emperor of Dune--and if God loves me, Heretics of Dune and Chapterhouse; Dune just to see what they do with the entire Emperor Sort-of-a-Semi-Libertarian-(if-we-are-really-flexible-on-the-definition-thereof)-Sandworm (Leto, wtf) because come on. I can't see how it could possibly be good. I don't care. I want my goddamn Sandworm God movie with the random bouts of political monologuing, the great ennui of being a all-seeing, all-knowing sort-of-sandworm, the really uncomfortable realization that Duncan's clones are fucking his other clones' kids and again, wtf Leto, before we get to Chapterhouse: Dune and get really confused about 'imprinting' and--oh.

It just hit me that Duncan, in all his lives, always gets fucked over whenever he's dumb enough to nail an Atreides.

...so I guess I know what my first purchases are for Kindle next month.

Vids

District 9 Vid to Inama Nushif - I haven't actualy seen the movie, but I really enjoyed this one.

Strange Infatuation by silverautumn, Heroes, Mohinder/Sylar. Beyond gorgeous, with near-perfect timing and oh. I almost forgot how very much I ship them.

Closing

I am saying, the father of the Giant Sort of Sandworm God shouldn't sparkle. I do not think my sanity will survive it.

ETA

Maybe Not Happening? - I should not be this relieved something I love isnt' being remade, but--Pattinson. No.

Comments

[merrily]

The father of the Giant Sandworm of So Not Subtle Political Philosophy--or God Emperor of Dune, whatever--is Robert Pattinson and I don't think I will survive knowing that.

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! NO NO NO!

You know, I quite liked the miniseries. Can't we just keep that as our Dune adaptation? Do we have to go poking at it?

[seperis]

I loved it, but for sheer visual, the first movie is just so incredible. OTOH, the second had Leto Atreides II, He Who Discards Shirts As Beneath Him (Praise Be), and the guy who played Duncan, He Who Wears an Emo Robe of Hotness, and I forgive many, many sins.

[northern]

lolololol....

And now I have to reread the Dune books.

[seperis]

That's my April project, apparently. Chapterhouse: Dune - Wow, These Characters Have a Lot of Politicalesque Sex.

[kuwdora]

♥ Sylar/Mohinder ♥

I never did get enough footage to make my epic slashvid about them. *forlorn*

[seperis]

They're so--something. *sighs happily*

[libitina]

I have great hopes that some day soon Robert Pattinson will develop a second facial expression so that he can act as well as Keanu Reeves.

Also, word on the delightful fight scene in the original movie version!

[seperis]

Even a variation on his one facial expression, like, IDK, an eyebrow twtich? SOMETHING.

Also, word on the delightful fight scene in the original movie version!

God yes. I keep thinking a viable Dune AU is Paul and Chani keeping Feyd as a pet and kind of--

*drifts off*

....was I saying something?

[libitina]

I would read it

[scy]

*blinks*

Pardon?

I got stuck on the visuals...of TEH PRETTY.

PRETTY FEYD.

*is ruthlessly supressing the possibility of a SPARKLING ATREIDES*

[the_future_modernes]

Robert Pattinson

...


...

...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!

[twistedchick]

As far as I remember, the original movie ran about two and a half hours -- and was cut down from a 4.5-hour master (or so I was told by film students at the time.) I want to see the master version of that one. Pattinson is just wrong for that role. Wrong style, wrong build, wrong energy.

And the only way anyone in Dune should sparkle is if the desert is made of diamonds, which it is not. I can imagine the Reverend Mother of the Bene Gesseret wearing some minor and tasteful bit of sparkly border on her robes (to imitate the queen of heaven, or something) but that's all.

[lanning]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

*sigh*

I suppose they've cast Larry the Cable Guy as Feyd? They might as well.

*goes in search of a Maker icon*

[ithiliana]

I loved DUNE when I was 14, and while Lynch's movie (first one, right?) was well Lynch's movie, it had its moments, and yeah, Sting was one of them, and the fight, yeah, and well, yeah.

Second movie....meh. I vaguely remember it. Pretty costumes? Or was that the series?

I don't recall.

I really loved DUNE when I was 14--gave up reading the series....well, before Brian started writing them.

God Emperor? I forget (was a while ago).

But, wow, DUNE at 14? It rocked my sf world.

[ithiliana]

why yes i am completely trying to ignore and block out sparkly Paul DOZ NOT WANT

[seperis]

*glum* The Sparkly Sort Of Sandworm God Emperor of Dune.

[xenakis]

No.


A WORLD OF NO.


*dies*

[senmut]

I follow these projects, and the last new news I had was that it had been dropped as 'too costly' and 'the sci-fi ship had sailed again'. Unfortunately, I cannot find my sources; probably twitter links as I don't make note of them closely anymore.

I too want a good adaptation.

May I ask your thoughts on the Sci-Fi Miniseries versions?

[seperis]

The miniseries had more accuracy and no weird sound weapons, so I didn't hate it, and I loved getting Dune Messiah and Children of Dune, but Lynch's movie was the first I saw, and it was breathtaking, even now.

So, liked?

[senmut]

Here's a thought for you...before IMAX, getting to watch the longest version of Lynch's film on a planetarium screen, private viewing to just about 48 students and maybe 10 adults....

That was the last time I saw the original, for many, many reasons, and I don't think any experience could top it for me.

[nagasvoice]

The first time I saw the original movie, they showed the chopped-up version that made no sense. (I say this after having read the first few books at the time.) They spent all this excruciatingly long lingering time emphasizing the gross stuff (like horrible medical treatments for the bad guy) and totally skipped the sequence explaining the Water of Life stuff. I think nine-tenths of the audience was stoned out of their ever-lovin' gourds, because they certainly talked about it in line; and coming out, afterward, the same stoner dudes complained about how the studio had chopped it to bits because they wanted it to fail. The theater was horrible and made me rethink ever bothering to go see movies in theaters again.
It's the little things, you know...
The only experience that beats it for scary customers was probably Rocky Horror at midnight in Pacific Beach, a skeezy place where at the door they confiscated anything that could be thrown (some of the visitors who planned to bring in rice and toast were very disappointed), and the bouncers had big maglite-style flashlights that were like 18 inches long--and clearly needed them sometimes.
So it was years before I saw Dune again on the small screen, and that was the director's cut version, which made much more sense.
Let me just say having Pattinson in it couldn't have done that studio cut any further harm than it already had suffered, no?

[deejay.livejournal.com]

*images of Sting in a blue Speedo flash before me*

My day is now already complete. Thanks for that. *nods*

Re:

[seperis.livejournal.com]

It kind of makes everything worthwhile.

[mindyfromohio.livejournal.com]

Zen Koan For The Day: Is the remembrance of Sting-in-the-blue-leather-Speedo enough Good to balance out the fear of what Sparkly-Mua'dib might be? (and yes, I know. Fear is the mind-killer.)

[seperis.livejournal.com]

...I think it very well might.

[mindyfromohio.livejournal.com]

Have you seen Goodnight Dune (http://goodnightdune.com/)?

NO!

[lorelei76.livejournal.com]

No.
FUCK NO.
NO!
NOOOO!
This is a post full of lies. It has to be. Your source must be insane because Pattison as Paul IS BULLSHITTERY TO THE EXTREME.

Also, the original Dune movie w/Kyle Mclachlan was awesome, IDGAF what anyone else says (mainly because the woman who played Lady Jessica gave me major ladyboner, and I had filthy dreams of Muad Dib using the voice to rip the clothes off my body and do nasty things to my body. What? I WAS 11 and hormonal!)

Re: NO!

[seperis.livejournal.com]

Oh, I wanted to be in a Paul-and-Chani sandwich, no lie, preferably while they were well-armed. With Feyd. Please.

Re: NO!

[jarlsberg71.livejournal.com]

Lies. you just wanted to go around putting "Heart Plugs" in people, so you could walk around and go "Bored Now!" and have them exsanguinate on the 1980's linoleum.

My "sister" Jim and I always called Muad'Dib the "Cuisinart Hatchback" It gives a lovely mental image.

[ivy03.livejournal.com]

The father of the Giant Sandworm of So Not Subtle Political Philosophy--or God Emperor of Dune, whatever--is Robert Pattinson

:O

[seperis.livejournal.com]

*hands*

[faithharkness.livejournal.com]

I am just going to be over here CRYING about this. There is not enough NO and DO NOT WANT in the UNIVERSE. Oh gods, tweens are going to go see it and think that's what the book is about--sparkly broody awesomeness and then they're going to cry when it's not about sparkles and then I'm going to have to start braining teens in the bookstore. Why?!?!?!?!?!? The Dune series is my favorite sci-fi series of books. I've been reading and re-reading since I was 14. I had the chickenpox and read all six of the original books in a week. I fell in love with Duncan Idaho (many times).

I'm just going to go home and cuddle my Children of Dune DVD with Ian McNeice's signature.

And the horror--if they get sparkleRob for Paul, you know that means that they're eventually going to get Beiber for Leto, right? I think I'm going to go find a cave to live in for the next couple of years......

Yay! Inama Nushif!!!! From Children of Dune!!! *scampers off to mourn and listen to that score**

[seperis.livejournal.com]

Yay! Inama Nushif!!!! From Children of Dune!!! *scampers off to mourn and listen to that score**

I love that song. More vids should be set to it.

(I also love that montage. Like, just ridiculously.)

[faithharkness.livejournal.com]

"More vids should be set to it."

And how. My father calls that the Godfather scene with all the cleaning of the House. I fell in love with Brian Tyler over that score--the man learned a made up literary language to write a song in it. Now THAT'S geekdom. I just took my macros off my flashdrive this morning, which pisses me off because I have a great "Leto II demands an explanation for this FUCKERY" one I could have used. :(

[cat-77.livejournal.com]

King Sparkle? No fucking way.

[seperis.livejournal.com]

*nods sadly* Sparkle'Dib.

[cat-77.livejournal.com]

Ooh! Told johnnym77 about this and he provided me with this link (http://www.avclub.com/articles/paramount-gives-up-on-making-new-dune-film,53514/) that says it's a no-go. We can hope, right?

[seperis.livejournal.com]

*BOUNCES* JUST UNTIL PATTINSON IS OFF THE TABLE. PLEASE GOD.

In honor of this, I shall watch Leto II Of No Shirtness tonight.

[cat-77.livejournal.com]

As a red-blooded gay male, he says he appreciates your choice. *g*

[kuhekabir.livejournal.com]

How often do you need to remake that movie? I mean there are two good versions out there already...and another one? Seriously? *is baffled*

[seperis.livejournal.com]

We need God Emperor of Dune. GIANT SORT OF SANDWORM ON A THRONE! It would be a concept movie, but I mean, set James McAvoy on a throne wearing some strategic sandtrout and I am there.

[kuhekabir.livejournal.com]

Well, I stop reading the books after the second one (or was it the third?) I lost interest, it got too far fetched? It didn't hold any elements from what made me like the first one...but I can't argue with James McAvoy, that guy is hunky! I could be presuaded to watch anything he is in it!

[seperis.livejournal.com]

Oh man, the fifth and sixth books--just--they are cracky fun. God Emperor is kind of meh, but the last two? CRACK. Porny crack, even. Porny sexual imprinting crack.

[kuhekabir.livejournal.com]

LOL, I think the bug thing...or worm thing put me off. I can't remember. It's been a long time... :)

[turnonmyheels.livejournal.com]

I had no idea they were doing a new Dune adaptation, that makes me happy until I got to this part:

Robert Pattinson ???

REALLY???

UGH

[seperis.livejournal.com]

MAYBE NOT! See last link in ETA. *hopeful*

[silviakundera.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the Mohinder/Sylar vid rec! It was indeed lovely. *g*

[libel.livejournal.com]

A Chapterhouse movie would be all kinds of hotness.