the mutant registration act was highly inspiring

[seperis]

I'm always fairly relieved when I write under thirty thousand words, as I'm less likely to overthink it and I don't know if you know this, but the dividing line between 30K and 150K is what we call when I stop to think about what I'm writing. The core, what I actually meant to write, is usually about ten thousand words in there. Call it an executive summary. In my fandom career above the 30K line, there are precisely two exceptions to that, where I needed every word; the second was And All the World Beneath. The first was Jus Ad Bellum, which I'm currently bracing myself to re-read in lieu of X-Men First Class, since this movie completely--and I do mean completely--changed my view of Xavier.

I didn't like him then, and whoo, checking one of my first X-Men fic featuring him using Rogue as a stand-in for Erik---I would say it's not like that, but really, it kind of is--I really, really, really didn't like him, and I forgot that, which is why I'm currently having severe cognitive dissonance. I remember not really caring for him, but apparently, there's a period of time in there that I was ready to kill him, and then finally I did.

Now I feel bad about it, because with First Class canon, he totally could have led a mutant revolt against the humans when mutants were enslaved. He could have kicked great amounts of ass in the camps. He could have made them all kick their own asses. It's upsetting; I killed him because to get a world where the mutants fought back after beign confined to camps, I couldn't have him there, I needed him to catalyze Erik and Scott with his death; I couldn't see him able to take the step they needed that Erik would run with to create a new mutant oligarchy on earth. I couldn't see Scott and Jean and Logan letting themselves be corrupted by the new world order if Xavier could pull them back. I didn't think if he was there, they could do what they had to do to survive.

Do comic fans feel like this when you get a new writer for the series (or hey, Ultimate)? I never was into teh Batman movies enough to feel the dissonance, but I am officially getting a headache from a.) guilt (I--know, leave me alone, I've been McAvoy's since Children of Dune and all that time without a shirt; way to go God!) and also b.) interpretation failure on a massive scale. I don't mind making leaps, but either they are that different in character or I missed something important in the first movie (and later, somewhat, in the second and various cartoons over the years).

I'm not sure I so much got better about writing out my character dislike (see, Smallville; it was a lesson), but I'm not sure I was ever so naked about before X-Men or after.

Also, for the record, I just realized I wrote Erik/Toad and I have no memory of why. I didn't even write slash back then. I didn't even write anything Logan/Rogue! And now I am all confused because ten years ago I didn't like Xavier and I'm pretty sure I didn't care for Erik and now I am in some kind of fugue state when I think of Charles (I think of him as Charles okay?) and realized I've really missed writing the apocalypse. And that I wrote Erik/Toad, and somewhere I have to have some notes on where the hell that came from.

Sometimes I think fanfic writers' problems are kind of unsettling. Feel free to share your own! That's kind of a plea, in case I need to be more transparent here.

Comments

[scy]

Oh yeah, you have it bad, hon. *pats your shoulder*

I am in that 'omg, should I write that?' stage, where I'm not sure it will work right, but it's so damn SHINY that I waaaant to.

ARGH.

[domarzione]

Erik/Toad. Oh, why. WHY?

Ultimate was a totally different ball of wax because it was started by Mark Millar and he made everyone totally hateful and awful (entirely killing the fandom in its cradle, says the girl who started the epic and didn't finish it) and then Bendis showed up and made everyone wry and precious like in Ult-Spidey and started raiding canon 616-verse plots for story arcs. It was an unnecessary idea birthed by irresponsible parents, whored out for crack vials and beef jerky, and then placed into foster care with Howard and Marion Cunningham.

But, yes. There are many examples of writers taking meh characters, even meh characters with history, and turning them into something breathtaking. (Bendis, to his credit, took over Daredevil and gave Foggy Nelson an agency that forty years of canon had denied him.) Rick Veitch's The Question miniseries was utter brilliance on behalf of a character that had fallen by the wayside. For mainstream guys, Brad Meltzer gets a lot of shit -- quite deservedly -- for what he does in the DCU (*cough*Identity Crisis*cough*), but he writes the most amazing Roy Harper ever, a thoughtful and insightful man when the rest of the DCU treats him like the perennial superannuated teenager with the unplanned kid and the itinerant lifestyle and the addiction recovery and the inability to focus on what's in front of him. If you met Meltzer's Roy after everyone else's, you'd have a similar reaction to how you're treating Xavier -- *this* is a character I could do stuff with. This is a character I could take over the world with. (Except Roy would stop for beer and pretzels and then a slurpee for his daughter, which is not Xavier's thing as much.)

[scy]

And I should add that Ultimate X-men has a host of issues that can send me off on rants, and yeah, rewriting canon can go WELL, or so badly that you want to chuck the book at the wall.

This Charles, he could lead a revolution, and make you think that it was your idea, and more importantly, he would do it saying 'well, it's the best thing to do.' He has much narrower lines in many ways, and some of them he will step over for his loved ones, and some he will blur for them.

IDK, I have always liked Erik, in his many incarnations, and thought (since I was so young it was hard to reach the comics racks) that he and Charles had the messiest divorce EVER, and should really run a combined school. Because, really, at the end of the day, they are the one person that they other can speak to, even if they don't agree, and the one that they KNOW will keep them in check, no matter what.

[out_there]

I'm always fairly relieved when I write under thirty thousand words, as I'm less likely to overthink it and I don't know if you know this, but the dividing line between 30K and 150K is what we call when I stop to think about what I'm writing.

Hee. Personally, my tipping point is around 8k. Under 8k it's a short story, it's fun, and it doesn't get overthought. It gets written and beta'd and done. Once I hit the 8k mark, there's a chance this will be anything from 10k to 40k in words (I've only gone over that twice and they were my Sports Night Epics which will probably never be repeated again... okay, there might be a Jeeves & Wooster one too that's around that, but I'm sure that's it.) and then I have to work out how to get from *here* to *the end*.

Strangely enough, 8k is also always where I stop and wonder if:
a) this thing has plot, and if it does, is it interesting to anyone other than me? Is it worth reading a whole story for?
b) are these characters still themselves, or is this starrting to head into Mills'n'Boon melodrama and cut-out character land?
c) Given that this is the turmoil here, and the happy ending is all the way over there, how do I stretch that divide? Because this is always the point where half of me would like to tack on a "and they lived happily ever after" line and finish it, (and go write something new) rather than stick it through to the eventual ending.
d) How am I going to find the time to write this stuff? (Mind you, once I work out the answer to C, the time is never really an issue. It's just a pretend issue that worries me mid-fic.)

And now I am all confused because ten years ago I didn't like Xavier and I'm pretty sure I didn't care for Erik and now I am in some kind of fugue state when I think of Charles (I think of him as Charles okay?) and realized I've really missed writing the apocalypse.

I figure it's probably fannish maturity. I swear, some characters become appealing as you grow older and start to see their side of the story (Phantom of the Opera is a perfect example for me. At 13-16 years old, the Phantom was my favourite and Roaul was dull and boring. By 25-30 years old, I can see the appeal in a nice, wealthy, non-psychotic boyfriend and gut instinct knows the Phantom is very *wrong*.).

Plus, y'know, Charles is different from Xavier. He is. Charles is young and fun and interesting, practical but still enjoying life. Xavier can be, well, a bit of a killjoy; he's a good man, but he's someone who's spent so much time consciously being a good person that it's second nature, that he's careful and considerate and wise. And while that can be a great person as a leader (and good for the human race) that's surprisingly hard to love on a personal level. In Magneto v. Xavier, Magneto has more passion, more drive -- it might be misguided but you can fall for passion far easier than you can fall for reasonableness and patience. Whereas in Erik v. Charles, they're both so *young*, so full of potential and flaws, and there's such a possibility that things should be able to turn out right.

YMMV, of course, but while I've always loved Erik and Magneto (and, oh, that time in comics when he was Joseph, too), it's Charles that makes me want to love Xavier a lot more.

[seperis]

Erik/Toad. Oh, why. WHY?

My original author notes seem to indicate I was having a temper tantrum against All W/R Writers Suck As They Only Write W/R And Suck. The only explanation I have for pairing is I didn't write Xavier (much) and I was having a temper tantrum, and nothing is quite like writing Erik/Toad while Erik is thinking of Charles and Rogue is sharing the memory with Toad. God I love this fandom: i can write that sentence and it makes sense.

It was an unnecessary idea birthed by irresponsible parents, whored out for crack vials and beef jerky, and then placed into foster care with Howard and Marion Cunningham.

...you have a way with metaphors. OR something. *awed* That is beautiful.

I'm fascinated how readers have handled comic shifts like that. I never thought about how complex that would be before. Thank you. *mulling*

(I could totally take over the world with Charles. I just sit around thinking of exciting ways for him and Erik to do it. It's giddy.)

[scy]

The comics industry LOVES shifts like that because it's a change to do shiny covers and endless variants and sell people on a concept that they can then discard and pretend didn't happen, as though they weren't attempting to create mayhem from the get-go.

I *really* want Charles and Erik taking over the world, NGL.

[domarzione]

Being a comics fan means having a very selective memory and a high pain threshold. Or, how you can go from saying "oh, thank goodness Willingham is taking over Robin because he's awesome on Fables and Lewis is writing stories with twin alien Amish tag-team luchadores wrestling in barns" to "Jesus, this is so awful, I miss the tag-team Amish wrestlers" in just a few months.

Or, you know, take a look at the shitstorm currently going down with the just-announced DU relaunch/reboot.

You are taking over the world with Charles. I'm currently halfway through the introduction to this universe, having been interrupted by the trek to another part of the city to fete my paternal unit with bourbon and cookies. I expect another installment promptly.

[seperis]

*grins* You are always at option to request. It's been a while since I wrote, and I'm working on the second one in this fandom and I still haven't written the one I want (I really want to revisit teh mutant registration act like whoa. If they can do this, I can move that back by a few decades, I'm just saying.)

Or, how you can go from saying "oh, thank goodness Willingham is taking over Robin because he's awesome on Fables and Lewis is writing stories with twin alien Amish tag-team luchadores wrestling in barns" to "Jesus, this is so awful, I miss the tag-team Amish wrestlers" in just a few months.

*can't stop laughing hysterically*

[nagasvoice]

I've had occasional horrifying moments of cognitive dissonance where I realized a character looked like X at first (hated them!) and then, guess what, they're not even a frenenmy of your hero, they're just a reality check, and they won't shut up and get run over so easily as all that. And...then they get interesting. And maybe it turns out they're a lot smarter than your hero, in lots of odd ways.
To make a fairly sloppy HP fandom analogy (because I'm not expert on it and don't write it myself) this might be like finding out Snape (nasty teacher who you hated at first) is your best bet among all the teachers to keep things running at the darn Hogwarts school, and damn good at your back when the whole world is turning into a combat zone. And then wit and intellect is always hawt, isn't it? Arrrrgh.
Or finding out a beta reader is right about some major story issues, and you might as well toss up the whole card deck in the air and start right over.
Or that your beta reader is right on some things but totally clueless on others, and you actually are looking at a totally different piece of advice than you thought you were working with. Like you completely did not realize one of your best friends was so appallingly blank and ignorant on a touchy issue you'd assumed they knew all about, and it changes your entire world view about them and about *how you pick out your friends.*
Or fighting with them-- people leave fandoms because it's so painful to keep dealing with that person they fought with, or keep fighting with.
That kind of cognitive dissonance is outright painful. For days, because your entire view of people and how they tick and what you do about them is in a heap like a Rube Goldbergian thing that the cat shoved off the table.
"Ooops, where you working on that?"
It takes awhile to sort out where your prior world view was inaccurate, and tinker with it. It doesn't even matter how trivial the actual trigger may be, the total flipflop is so massively distracting.
For me, that kind of stuff stays with me for *days.* It can have an arc to the stress, just like running a fever.
It takes some real managing to keep it from occupying my brain when I need it for other stuff. You know, like, driving cars, and work. Walking and chewing gum at the same time, stuff like that.
I don't know if you're asking for advice on managing the pain, but hey, every little management idea helps, I think.
I've been forced to handle it the same way I handle panic, or intrusive, repetitive thinking about some upcoming dreaded event: Set it firmly aside, tell myself I'm not working on that right now, and turn my attention on Something Else that needs doing. It helps if it's tangible, physical, real. Take out the trash, clean the catbox (phew! that'll get your attention), get the hose out and water the plants. Pet the darn cat who threw everything on the floor, perhaps. Now, if you've been doing that set-aside bit for 2-3 days, little bits have kind of settled out of the air, maybe you've talked to some folks about it, things are calmer, you can see the icky jagged bits where your map of the situation just cracked and broke right off.
Also, while I'm Not Thinking About That, maybe I've collected some random info on the problem, picked up a bunch of little notes, started a research file to start pushing out the debris and getting moving again. When I'm ready, I'll start piling that stuff together and see if any of it holds together.
And if it's still too much, I just go back to playing Cleopatra with the palm fronds for awhile longer, get that Rowing Down De Nile going again.

[domarzione]

*can't stop laughing hysterically*

It was not funny at the time. Trust me. ;)

Okay, so I'm requesting. I'm all for the anti-heroes.

You could move the mutant registration act back in time. The CIA still has Cerebro; all they need is another telepath (or you could have them kidnap Charles and man, watching Erik mount a rescue with outrageous casualties... you know you want to). They also have the master lists that Charles himself compiled. And all of Charles's briefing notes. You can go all Brave New World with the testing and the classifying and...

[cesare]

I don't think you should feel bad about disliking Xavier. He's always been a frustratingly oblique character, as if writers mostly couldn't imagine how a man could believe in peace and co-existence without personally being a cardboard saint. And so patronizing! As someone noted over on marina's DW, dozens of plots in the comics boil down to "Stuff happens and Professor X refuses to let the X-Men know what's going on until the villain shows up and tells them the truth." In the previous movie trilogy, they leaned hard on the fact that Patrick Stewart played Xavier and automatically won the audience over in large part just because hey, it's Patrick Stewart. He gave Xavier some dry humor and some hints of doubt and woe, but mostly Xavier was convinced he was right, and the movies agreed with him, and that was that.

Charles though! Charles is an almost inexplicably horrible person. He reads minds to score with chicks! (And I'm sure he thinks he's being quite the white knight by doing so, since after all, he could just make women think they wanted him, so only cheating a little by totally violating their privacy is practically fair play.) He changes peoples' minds when he doesn't feel like persuading them! I was amazed that the movie went there, and somehow James MacAvoy made it all seem so inevitable and human that now, like you, for the first time he's Charles to me, and I'm kind of in love.

[seperis]

He had me at 'mutations are groovy'. I melted right into the floor. Just--Charles. Yes. Please. Mindfuck more people please.

[niqaeli]

I still call him Willinghamfucktard after Robin and the man then showed us his ass repeatedly in interviews. (I miiiiight be a little bitter.)

Comics fandom (specifically DCU) was, in fact, what taught me how to select my canon and ignore everything else. Because not only is there contradictory canon, for any single point of characterisation or backstory you choose you can probably find directly contradictory canon. So if you want anything internally consistent, you're going to be cherrypicking pretty carefully.

Comics fandom burned me hard, but I don't mind because that was actually a pretty damn useful fannish skill to pick up and retain! Before comics fandom I was all CANON COMPLIANCE IS VITAL. But now, I never have to cry anymore about violating canon, because canon? Meh. Fanon very literally makes more sense!

[margrave]

YES! Yes, I UNDERSTAND!

My relationship with Jason Todd is one of COMPLETE and UTTER wreck of a relationship filled with HATE, LOVE, GUILT, HEARTBREAK (in that order) that is made WORSE by DIFFERENT writers writing him. Yes, the guilt is always there, but you also learn to IGNORE big chunks of canon, which I just don't do in any other medium but comics.

And honestly speaking, my feelings toward Charles (like you, I have NOT being able to call him anything but Charles since the film) was pretty much DISLIKE and WHY HIM?! And just, I was all TEAM!MAGNETO! And then this film, oh, glorious, I NOW I JUST LOVE him and ADORE him, and I admit not filled with much guilt because this is comics, and with comics you pick and choose what you like and ignore the rest. Hell, the writers do it themselves.

[casspeach]

I hated Xavier in the first movies, even though Patrick Stewart! I think a lot of it is that he was just so smug, and a lot of it was the whole 'oh hey, Scott, trusted leader of my X-men. I know you and your crack first-flight team have logged many hours in the Danger Room learning to function as an efficient unit, but take this weird Canadian with anger issues and no memory and a tendency to just fuck off at inconvenient moments on this mission, would you?'

Which may have something to do with a) my ridiculous love for Scott and b) my massive hate-on for Wolverine. I just, seriously, do.not.get why people like him (apologies if you do, it's just a mystery to me).

I totally love Charles though. He's such an arse, and yet completely adorable and the end of the film made me cry like a baby.

I don't find Erik/Toad much of a leap either. I shall go looking for that after work :-)

[seperis]

Oh I have heard stories from Jason Todd fans. I feel so bad for them.

And honestly speaking, my feelings toward Charles (like you, I have NOT being able to call him anything but Charles since the film) was pretty much DISLIKE and WHY HIM?! And just, I was all TEAM!MAGNETO! And then this film, oh, glorious, I NOW I JUST LOVE him and ADORE him, and I admit not filled with much guilt because this is comics, and with comics you pick and choose what you like and ignore the rest. Hell, the writers do it themselves.

I admit, every time he mindwhammied, I loved him more. Just love.

[margrave]

I live through it by ACTIVELY ignoring YEARS of canon. It is the only way, though I admit, I still get rather, um, passionate when I think too much on it.

EXACTLY! Just EVERY TIME! And I know he's breaking ALL sort of ethical issues here, but like, telepathy, it is part of him, it is who he is, it is like telling me to IGNORE people talking next to me when there's something really interesting going on. And I just adored the ways he used his powers. That yes, I loved it every time he used his powers - when he was picking up girls (not to make them go out with him, but obviously reading minds to figure out whether he's on the right tracks), how he FREEZES people, how he told the Russian soldier to forget him (WHILE making sure he was OK!), how he HELD Shaw still while Erik forced a coin THROUGH his brain. (I just finished reading your 7-page meta, and it is like the most amazing thing, ever. And yes, that scene, that scene when Erik is killing his mother's murderer, when he is killing Charles. Just that whole scene.)

Just - I didn't expect to love Charles Xavier, ever. This film made me LOVE him the best. And OK, I like Erik, I sympathise with him, hell, his line on the beach about being at the mercy of men who followed orders, that, ok, that had me at visceral level. HOWEVER, at the same time, I can't condone what he wanted to do on that beach, killing all of those men when there was no real reason to, not at that point anymore. They were no longer a threat.

This Charles is real to me, this beer-guzzling, bad pick-line sprouting professor of genetics who find mutation to be groovy (with no hint of irony), his sheer love of genetics - it is all there for me to adore. But man, that streak of ruthlessness, that inner core of steel (I really want to make a bad pun here), just gods, he went to face off with Magneto right AFTER he had a COIN FORCED ALL THE WAY THROUGH HIS BRAIN. He erased Moira's memories because she was a threat, and he nullified the threat without deaths. And he believes, he truly believes that there can be integration, that their differences can be resolved without a blood bath. But he doesn't trust. If Charles Xavier believes you to be a threat, he will remove that threat. He beleives every one deserves a chance, but he will not have anyone put what is his under danger. Just - GODS, I LOVE HIM SO VERY MUCH!

[feanna]

I have thus far spent HOURS creating several OCs in a verse where Erik and Charles stay together after the beach. This involves backstory going back to WW2, a healer, non-mutants, MPREG (with Shaw as the "other" dad, baby inherits his powers) and a local Jewish/mutant(mostly small time)/other community in the states that also kind of adopts baby Jean (as in Jean Grey) or really, she adopts them.

And then Charles and Erik contact one member of the community when they start looking for mutants again and this person is all, well, we should really get everybody together to discuss all of this/Charles reads stuff in somebody's mind and then Charles and Erik get dropped into this existing community and there are even one or two people who remember that boy that Shaw (or Dr. Schmidt as they know him) was suddenly all about.

THIS IS WHAT MY BRAIN DOES TO ME, AND I CAN'T EVEN WRITE (sadface!), WHAT IS THIS?



Also, is this the wrong time and place to mention (re:length) that while I totally enjoyed what x-men-fic you've posted so far, there were some transitions where I could have used a bit more explanations? (Though I do think I got it at the end and I was sleep deprived in there, but there were one or two moments when I was all: What's this now??) ; P

[feanna]

Also, I am totally calling them Charles and Erik, I mean I love the explanation for how they got to be called Professor X and Magneto, which is that the kids essentially came up with ridiculous nicknames for they're dads while they were goofing around, and they were having some SERIOUS fun there! and the mood they were in is exactly how seriously I can take people called Profeesor X and Magneto, I mean I get it as a kind of cover identity or role they play, and maybe in some verse(ses) they lose the rest of themselves mostly, but I can't see them thinking of eah other as anything but Charles and Erik and if they stay together that's who they are, SO! THERE!

TL;DR: Charles is so much nicer than Xavier (especially if you know the German version of Xavier, which is Xaver and is basically pronounces Ksafer, which is just not on).

[ratcreature]

I think when you last as a superhero comic fan for longer than two years or so, you get used to contradictory canon, characterizations and reboots, so that you just pick and choose what you like, and then build your own head-canon. Then you tend to (dis-)like official editorial moves based on that, only to be sometimes swayed by rather brilliant reimaginations anyway. It's somewhat like reading fanfic in a fandom with relatively little canon material but a ton of fanfic that builds on some kernel into all directions. Also a bit like fairy tales, where something like Red Riding Hood can be told and retold as pretty much anything, yet you can still see the fairy tale in it.

[akacat]

Go AU with Charles 15-20 years younger than Erik and kidnapped when he's just a wee lad of 16 18. And Erik is the one who wanted to keep the status quo, but he rescues Charles and Charles seduces him and they take over the world together.

...idek why my brain went there.

[npkedit]

If you love comics, you have to learn to live with the headaches that come with the retcons, changes, etc. And the reinterpretations that are often enough to send your head spinning ("I love you wife," sent Cyclops-loving me in a rage away from the comics for a very long time). Or you just ignore them. That's what fic is for ;)

On the other hand, if it makes you feel better, Jus ad Bellum is still a masterpiece of fic (I even referenced it a couple of days ago when speaking of stories that should have won awards that they didn't get!).

[seperis]

You might have just suggested something I've never done. I've written teh before, middle, and after of a war, but not the war itself. I'm curious if I can pull that off now.

[seperis]

At 13-16 years old, the Phantom was my favourite and Roaul was dull and boring. By 25-30 years old, I can see the appeal in a nice, wealthy, non-psychotic boyfriend and gut instinct knows the Phantom is very *wrong*.

...you read Susan Kay's Phanton didn't you? Somewhere in my Great Plastic Bin of Everything I Wrote Before Computers, a red spiral notebook has the sequel to that half-written. It included Raul locking Christine up and telling people she was crazy, but she escaped to find the Phantom. Was. Alive.

YMMV, of course, but while I've always loved Erik and Magneto (and, oh, that time in comics when he was Joseph, too), it's Charles that makes me want to love Xavier a lot more.

Yesssss. He's so young and ridiculous and sweet and ruthless and those shouldn't go together, but they do, and I'm like "MINDWHAMMY MORE PEOPLE PLZ".

[seperis]

BEER GUZZLING. IT IS LIKE WTF YOU ARE A DRUNK TELEPATH! *Delighted*

And he believes, he truly believes that there can be integration, that their differences can be resolved without a blood bath. But he doesn't trust. If Charles Xavier believes you to be a threat, he will remove that threat. He beleives every one deserves a chance, but he will not have anyone put what is his under danger. Just - GODS, I LOVE HIM SO VERY MUCH!

You just summed up what I love about him. I want to love the good guys, but they're mostly irritating and stupid and idealistic and they win by sheer fucking accident. Charles is idealist and realistic (sometimes) and smart and not afraid to do what's necessary. It's freaking catnip.