*sighs* my life.

[seperis]

The problem is, I fool myself that I lack vanity. It's a huge lie. The truth is I am vain and lazy, so I am worried about how I look but never feel inspired to do much about it in teh long term.

But in the short term?

So far in prep for the Bahamas I have:

1.) Bought tinted moisturizer, guaranteed to make me look less fish belly white. It promises a *glow*.

2.) Loofah to scrub down and remove all traces of dead skin.

3.) Did hair to more festive summer color of light brown/caramel/blonde.

4.) Bought apricot body scrub for emergency scrubbing (yeah, don't ask)

5.) Obsessively cleaning, moisturizing, and doing that thing with that stuff that prevents acne. A *lot*.

6.) Shoe shopped. DSW is my heroin.

7.) Bathing suit obsession. God. Dammit. For years, I managed to do it the old fashioned way and wait until the last second to grab whatever was left. But no. This time, I was going to be a careful shopper and pick something that looked good and was pretty. I discovered, like many women, that no matter what bathing suit I tried on, it looked terrible. Even the ones I didn't try on I instinctively *knew* would look terrible. The ones that they no longer stocked, of course, were the ones that I was certain would make me look taller, thinner, prettier, and less fish-belly white.

I cannto believe I spent three hours staring at bathing suits.

So I did it a differnet way. I foudn the cutest little skirt cover up and bought the bathing suit that matched.

...yeah. Do not judge me. I judge myself for the credit card bill.

8.) Bought shorts.

Okay, I live in Texas, but I don't have a call for shorts a lot. Or ever. I wear jeans because they are comfy, or aroudn the house, recycled jeans turned into cut off shorts if I have to go outside for some insane reason like watering plants or letting the rabbit exercise. My moment of horror came when I realized I was going on a five day cruise and had no summerwear.

And hey, when did shorts get this short? *blank* Some could double as fairly uncomfortable underwear. Well, I didnt' buy those, but the ones I did get? Jesus.

9.) Scheduled a waxing.

This is still something I may drop depending on panic level when I really understand that this is a process in which wax is put on me--in places that are say, fairly sensitive--and then ripped away. Right now it's still theoretical and I am dazzled by the idea of no razors.

However, I did discover what a Brazilian was. What is a mystery is how flexible you have to be to get one. That is--yeah. Huh.

*puts head on laptop* I feel the need to disclaim this by saying, rarely if ever will you *ever* see me obsessively trying on dresses again. As I did the other weekend. *Over twenty*. And typically, they all looked terrible. Except this one that was in teh wrong size but I am convinced would indeed have made me look taller, thinner, more attractive, and incredibly intelligent. I think it also can make julienne fries. Yes.

Of course.

Note: There is no mood here for ashamed. *sad*

Comments

[seperis.livejournal.com]

Hmm. See, I have heard it sounds a lot more painful than it actually is. My high school Spanish teacher lived in Argentina (or Chile?) for a while and raved about the wonders of waxing. So--I keep just not thinking hard about it and hopefully, will not freak out like, an hour beforehand. Or while they are applying the wax. *g*

[spike21.livejournal.com]

well, it is kind of unpleasant -- especially the first time you get it done, like I said, it's *fast*. One thing you can do if you're worried about freaking out is get sugared instead. It's not quite as effective as wax, but with sugar, if you totally spazz about it you can just rinse it off, while with wax, once it's on you're kind of committed.